A-Town's Bookshelf: The Year in Books, 2023

I hated reading when I was younger. I think it was because, during my school years, the only stuff I ever read was forced upon me. This is not to say that those books were always bad. I just didn't love that I had no choice in the matter. I discovered the joy of "reading for fun" after I graduated college. I mostly attribute this to Dan Brown's books - several of which I read quickly and surprisingly enjoyed, due to their short chapter lengths and constant cliffhangers. I would not refer to myself as an avid reader or bookwork, but I have gone proactively out of my way to read a handful of books each year over the past decade or so. But nothing can hold a candle to what happened this year.

Early in 2023, I made the very adult decision to renew my library card, mainly so I could read a Star Wars book that I didn't want to spend actual money on. It was a good book. That was a good decision. For a few years, I've heard people talking about the "Libby" app - a mobile app that allows librarygoers to listen to audiobooks - which I never quite comprehended. Plus, I have never been a big audiobook guy. I just have a hard time paying attention if I'm doing literally anything else. However, in the midst of my paternity leave this summer, I figured I'd try it out, just to see what it was all about.

Here I am, at the end of 2023, to tell you that Libby and its paid alternative Audible, were basically best friends to me this year. I absolutely CRUSHED some audiobooks this year. During my second stint of paternity leave, there were many, many, many days when I would just watch my boys and play "NBA 2K23" with an audiobook going. Crushed it. I listened to so many books. Understand this: I was listening basically all day long and was finishing new audiobooks every 2-3 days. It was not normal behavior. (Now, before some of you come at me with the old "I read 96 books last month" comments, let me just say that the number of books that I completed was a staggering amount for me. I am sure I barely scratch the surface of what some of you have been able to do in your lives, but for me, this was insane.

Also, let me say something that these 96-Books-Per-Month people will never admit: when I'm listening to an audiobook, there is no way that I retain and comprehend 100% of everything that's going on. For some of the books I cruised through, maybe 70% would be a good guess. And not all of the books that I finished were good. In fact, I suffered through a couple of them, and even cranked up the listening speed on a few, just so I could cross the finish line and move on.

Some books, on the other hand, were really, really good, and I stumbled across some great stuff this year, for which I am grateful.

I used the "Goodreads" app (which is a bit confusing and, at times, difficult to use) to keep track of all of the books I finished this year, and I rated all of them on a five-star scale, not only because I'm a weirdo that loves stats and rating things, but also to help fellow readers have a better idea of whether or not a book is any good. I just wish that I could have given half-stars in my ratings because sometimes "4 stars" doesn't quite accurately reflect how close I would have come to giving some books (like Jurassic Park) a five-star rating.

Anyway, with all of that information in mind, I thought it would be fun to start another Year in Review blog, as a way for me (and probably only me) to look back and reflect on the books I've read from year to year. I was very excited when Goodreads sent me a yearly recap of my reading journey, which should make this blog much simpler for me to write.

But first, a meme:

Now, let us begin.

Books Read

Here is a list of all of the books I completed in 2023, along with my star rating:

1. Star Wars: The Fallen Star by Claudia Gray, 3/5 stars
2. No Time Like the Future: An Optimist Considers Mortality by Michael J. Fox, 3/5 stars
3. Gone Tomorrow (Jack Reacher # 13) by Lee Child, 3/5 stars
4. Beyond the Wand: The Magic and Mayhem of Growing Up a Wizard by Tom Felton, 4/5 stars
5. Star Wars: Convergence by Zoraida Cordova, 4/5 stars
6. Jurassic Park by Michael Crichton, 4/5 stars
7. The Ride of a Lifetime: Lessons Learned from 15 Years as CEO of the Walt Disney Company by Robert Iger, 5/5 stars
8. The Last Human by Zack Jordan, 1/5 stars
9. Without Remorse by Tom Clancy, 3/5 stars
10. Red Rising by Pierce Brown, 3/5 stars
11. Deception Point by Dan Brown, 5/5 stars
12. World War Z: An Oral History of the Zombie War by Max Brooks, 2/5 stars
13. The Lost World by Michael Crichton, 2/5 stars
14. Star Wars: Thrawn by Timothy Zahn, 2/5 stars
15. The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe by C.S. Lewis, 4/5 stars
16. Prince Caspian by C.S. Lewis, 4/5 stars
17. How to Win Friends and Influence People in the Digital Age by Dale Carnegie, 4/5 stars
18. Fairest of All (Villains # 1) by Serena Valentino, 5/5 stars
19. Poor Unfortunate Soul (Villains # 2) by Serena Valentino, 3/5 stars
20. The Beast Within (Villains # 3) by Serena Valentino, 3/5 stars
21. Unbirthday by Liz Braswell, 2/5 stars
22. The Voyage of the Dawn Treader by C.S. Lewis, 3/5 stars
23. Mistress of All Evil (Villains # 4) by Serena Valentino, 4/5 stars
24. The Fellowship of the Ring by J.R.R. Tolien, 4/5 stars
25. Blowing the Bloody Doors Off: And Other Lessons in Life by Michael Caine, 4/5 stars
26. Mother Knows Best (Villains # 5) by Serena Valentino, 3/5 stars
27. The Odd Sisters (Villains # 6) by Serena Valentino, 2/5 stars
28. Evil Thing (Villains # 7) by Serena Valentino, 5/5 stars
29. Soon I Will Be Invincible by Austin Grossman, 3/5 stars
30. Cold Hearted (Villains # 8) by Serena Valentino, 3/5 stars
31. Radical Love: Learning to Accept Yourself and Others by Zachary Levi, 4/5 stars
32. The Silver Chair by C.S. Lewis, 2/5 stars
33. The Two Towers by J.R.R. Tolkien, 5/5 stars
34. The House with a Clock in Its Walls by John Bellairs, 2/5 stars
35. Star Wars: Heir to the Empire by Timothy Zahn, 5/5 stars
36. If You Would Have Told Me by John Stamos, 3/5 stars
37. Star Wars: Cataclysm by Lydia Kang, 5/5 stars
38. Being Henry: The Fonz... and Beyond by Henry Winkler, 3/5 stars
39. Steelheart (The Reckoners # 1) by Brandon Sanderson, 5/5 stars
40. Never, Never (Villains # 9) by Serena Valentino, 2/5 stars
41. Mitosis (The Reckoners # 1.5) by Brandon Sanderson, 3/5 stars
42. Star Wars: Death Troopers by Joe Schreiber, 4/5 stars
43. Fire & Fate (Villains # 10) by Serena Valentino, 4/5 stars
44. No Is a Four-Letter Word: How I Failed Spelling but Succeeded in Life by Chris Jericho, 4/5 stars
45. The Great Train Robbery by Michael Crichton, 3/5 stars
46. Star Wars: The Perfect Weapon by Delilah S. Dawson, 2/5 stars
47. Star Wars: Master and Apprentice by Claudia Gray, 4/5 stars
48. Walt Disney: The Triumph of the American Imagination by Neal Gabler, 4/5 stars

Other Stats

The A-Town Awards

Best Book of the Year: Steelheart by Brandon Sanderson

Honorable Mention: Deception Point by Dan Brown

Worst Book of the Year: The Last Human by Zack Jordan

Honorable Mention: Unbirthday by Liz Braswell

Best Audiobook Narration: Andy Serkis (The Fellowship of the Ring, The Two Towers by J.R.R. Tolkien)

Honorable Mention: Susanne Blakeslee (Evil Thing by Serena Valentino)

 

*****

There you have it! My first-ever Year in Review blog about books! Do any of the titles I read spark your interest? Do you have any recommendations for me?... because I absolutely live for book recommendations these days. Please, let me know what I should read next. Leave a note in the comments section, follow me on Twitter (here and here), find me on Facebook or, heck, even look me up on Goodreads, if you're into such things.

May the new year be full of even more literary adventures.

Until next time.

A-Town Playlist: Top Spotify Songs of 2023 and Songs for Griffin

If you're anything like me, you've been anticipating what your Spotify Wrapped for 2023 was going to look like for, oh, probably the last 11 and a half months. Thankfully, we need worry no longer, as our Spotify overlords have bestowed personalized statistics upon us once again, and I am more than happy to break my results down for you - right here, right now.

But first, a meme:

For those of you who lie awake at night wondering what kind of music I like and which artists I've had on repeat for the past 12 months, this may be the luckiest day of your lives.

Spotify Wrapped - Top 10 Songs

1. 
   Where the Streets Have No Name - U2
2. D'yer Mak'er - Led Zeppelin
3. One Headlight - The Wallflowers
4. I Don't Wanna Be In Love (Dance Floor Anthem) - Good Charlotte
5. Dancing in the Moonlight - King Harvest
6. My Body - Young the Giant
7. Wish I Knew You - The Revivalists
8. Everywhere - Fleetwood Mac
9. Here It Goes Again - OK Go
10. Simplify - Young the Giant

Analysis: "There is nothing new under the sun," I complained last year. Well, almost everything is new in my Top 10 songs this year! It only features one song by one of my Top 5 artists (more on them later), it features one song that virtually came out of nowhere ("Dancing in the Moonlight"), a mostly random song by Fleetwood Mac, and not one but two songs by Young the Giant. These are, perhaps, my most surprising Top 10 songs since I started doing these end-of-year blogs, and I'm actually ok with it.

It is highly noteworthy that many of the songs in my Top 100 came from a playlist I made for our eight-month-old boy, Griffin, in the months leading up to his delivery date, and I listened to that playlist every time I drove down for a baby appointment, so those songs got a lot of play time. For instance, "Where the Streets Have No Name" and "D'yer Makk'er" were the first two songs on that playlist, and I think all of the other songs, other than "Wish I Knew You" and "My Body," were also songs that I used for little Baby Griff's musical enjoyment.

I would have thought that there were a few other songs from Griffin's playlist that would have cracked the Top 10 way before King Harvest, Young the Giant and Fleetwood Mac, but whatever. I'm not that mad about it.

It is also notable that the only song from last year's Top 10 that stayed on the list this year was "Wish I Knew You" by the Revivalists. Everything else is new, which is a little wild.

Overall, pretty good stuff.

Minutes Listened

I was worried about this stat for 2023 because, as I've continued to work from home with two boys, the amount of time I spend listening to Spotify has significantly reduced over the past couple of years, and most of my Daddy Music Time (TM pending) comes when I'm driving or when I'm at the gym.

On top of that, during my time on paternity leave, I got really into something that I haven't really done much of in the past - listening to audiobooks. And believe me, I CRUSHED some audiobooks this year. Like, absolutely murdered them. If I'm lucky, I'll get some similar statistical recaps of how many books I've listened to this year and I'll make a blog of it. Those are some stats I'd be very curious to see.

Nevertheless, with Spotify Wrapped in mind, I tried my best to listen to Spotify as much as feasible so that I could rack up some relatively interesting totals for the end of the year.

I listened to 7,205 minutes of music on Spotify this year, which comes out to just over 120 hours. All things considered, that's not too bad, I guess.

(Editor's note: LOL look at me absolutely cramming in my listening on October 31 to try and solidify any last-minute moves on my song and artist leaderboards.)

As I have done for my MLBTV wrap-up blogs, I decided that I'll start keeping track of how much music I'm tallying each year so that I can compare the numbers more easily, because I'm weird and that's a thing that I like to be able to do.

• 2023: 7,205
• 2022: 9,000+
• 2021: 6,918
• 2020: ?
• 2019: 30,613
• 2018: ?

Looks like I didn't put (or wasn't provided) the actual number of minutes in my blogs for 2018 and 2020 (whoops), so I don't have access to those anymore, but I bet it that 2020 was way higher than 2021 and 2018 was high but a bit lower than 2019 because I think that was the first year that I regularly used Spotify.

Also, can you believe that total for 2019? Insane. That, of course, was back when I was working in an actual office, with a 20-minute commute both ways, and I basically listened to six or seven hours of Spotify, Monday-Friday most weeks. Work From Home life has changed me, man.

Top Artists

1. Weezer: Weezer maintains its top spot for the fourth year in a row (and five out of the last six). My "Artist of the Decade" is still going strong, after all these years. Long live Weezer.
2. The Struts: The Struts land in my Top 5 for the third year in a row. And the Struts "Strange Days Are Over Tour" t-shirts that my wife and I own would probably be in the Top 5 shirts of 2023, as well.
3. Billy Joel: Billy Joel is probably the artist who has been most criminally underrated by my Spotify Wrapped over the years. He and Elton John were the first concert that I ever attended, and I saw him live again a decade or so later. I tried to intentionally listen to him more often this year, and I am glad to see that my efforts were rewarded.
4. Creedence Clearwater Revival: I watched a documentary about Creedence Clearwater Revival on Netflix in October and it blew my mind to find out that, at the height of their popularity, they were one of the top bands in the world, along with The Beatles. I knew my dad liked them and, therefore, so did I, growing up, but I had no idea that they were that big. Upon finishing that documentary, I listened to a TON of CCR (the KAGE Match Champions of the World, for you Loyal A-Towners) to end the year. Welcome to the Top 5, gentlemen.
5. U2: I had a feeling that U2 might end up in my Top 5, and I would have been shocked if "Where the Streets Have No Name" wasn't my top song. I was correct on both counts. Believe it or not, I went through a really big U2 phase as a youth, and I would have probably considered them or Bon Jovi my favorite band before I discovered Weezer. If they ever come back to Utah on tour, I should go.

Top Genres

Here are my top genres of the year, presented as a very delicious, oddly shaped rock & roll sandwich:

Other Fun or Otherwise Notable Songs in My Top 100

Not all great songs can crack the Top 10 and not all of my favorite bands got their own infographic. Here are some other songs that landed in my Top 100 that made 2023 a delightful year of music:

(Editor's note: I've marked any songs that made my Top 100 because of their inclusion on Griffin's playlist with  SFG - Songs for Griffin)

• Call and Answer - Barenaked Ladies (#11; one of the most-listened-to songs on Griffin's playlist, SFG)
• This Is the Time - Billy Joel (#12; one of my favorite Billy Joel songs and a likely reason why he was one of my top artists, SFG)
• Africa - Weezer (#15; my top Weezer song on this year's list - a Spotify Wrapped mainstay -- also, it's better than the original)
• Carolina Reaper - Chili Jesson (#18; an absolute banger from the "NHL 22" video game soundtrack)
• Lift Me Up - Rihanna (#19; arguably the best thing that came from Black Panther: Wakanda Forever, SFG)
• Kid - The Revivalists (#20; if I had to pick a Revivalists song that I thought would have been in my Top 10 this year, this would have been it, SFG)
• Change the World - Eric Clapton (#25; fun fact: I hated this song when I heard it as a kid because I thought it was about recycling or something, SFG)
• Down on the Corner - Creedence Clearwater Revival (#27; my most-listened-to CCR song, SFG)
• Perfect Situation - Weezer (#31; I distinctly remember listening to this song with my brother Cody and discussing how it differs from the original version of this song that we were introduced to when we first heard it)
• Forever Young - Alphaville (#32; they used this music on one of the commercials I remember most vividly from my school years and I've loved the song ever since, SFG)
• Good Tonight - Daniel Pemberton/Anthony Ramos (#33; I talked about this song last year because it didn't quite make my Top 100 of 2022, but we got it on this year - one of Stockton's favorite songs in the whole world, for sure.
• Jump Jive An' Wail - The Brian Setzer Orchestra (#45; I put this song on Griffin's playlist because, while my wife was pregnant, I would often play this song and dance around the kitchen with Stockton while he laughed hysterically... plus, it's just a great song, SFG)
• Wake Me Up (Acoustic) - Aloe Blacc (#47; a creative find for Griffin's playlist, and a very good find, at that, SFG)
• Bridge Over Troubled Water - Simon & Garfunkel (#57; I don't believe that my wife was familiar with this song when I played it for her, which was interesting, SFG)
• Try Everything - Shakira (#58; arguably the best thing that came from Zootopia, and I have to - absolutely have to - sing along any time I hear it playing, SFG)
• Skyfall - Adele (#71; the best James Bond song, SFG)
• 100 Years - Five For Fighting (#75; I can't listen to this song without thinking of The Big Ticket - shoutout to Scott, Jon and living legend Mr. Lloyd, SFG)
• California Dreamin' - The Mamas & The Papas (#79; the most epic flute solo ever to grace the eardrums of mankind, SFG)
• Bounce - The Cab (#84; a "Rock Band" classic)
• Brooklyn Bridge to Chorus - The Strokes (#93; "a vibe," as the kids say - shame it wasn't higher on the list)
• Stacy's Mom - Fountains of Wayne (#94; an absolute travesty that this song isn't in at least my Top 25 - like... how???? HOW?!? - and the best part is that, when I crank this baby while cruising Redwood Road, my wife sings right along with me)
• Free Bird - Lynyrd Skynyrd (#98; the second-to-last song on Griffin's playlist - and I actually had to play it for him in the hospital because he came a couple days early before I was done with all the songs I'd picked out for him, SFG)
• Separate Ways (Worlds Apart) - Journey (#100; truth: this is one of my Top 5 favorite songs of all time - glad it made the cut)

The Bonus Track

A few times in the past, I've given honorable mention to a song that, sadly, didn't make my Top 100 for the year, and there is no question which song I want Song #101 to be this year:

My Way - Frank Sinatra

This was scheduled to be the final song on Griffin's playlist - the last song I'd play for him before he was born - but SOMEBODY decided to come a couple days early, in the middle of a freak snowstorm in April, so I had to play this and "Free Bird" in the wee hours of the morning on April 4, 2023, standing next to my sleeping wife and newborn child.

"My Way," indeed, Griff.

Songs for Griffin

I've been talking about this playlist for Griffin throughout the entire post, and it is very likely that some of you may have no idea what on earth I'm talking about. Let me enlighten you.

When my wife was pregnant with our first son, Stockton, I felt a little bit of pre-Dad Guilt from all those do-gooders who always brag about how many books they've read to their wife's pregnant belly and whatnot. I decided that I'd start playing one song a night for our yet-to-be-born child. It ended up being 75 songs over 75 nights, with no duplicated songs or artists. You can listen to Songs for Stockton here.

It was a lot of fun, so I wanted to do it again. However, for Griffin, no bands were off limits but I didn't want to duplicate any of the songs I had previously used for Stockton, which made things a little bit complicated. Let's just say that I had to get a little creative on some nights. But I got the job done and filled out a pretty nice little set list for Baby # 2.

Like I just mentioned, he showed up four days before his due date. I had planned on ending the playlist a couple nights early, just in case, but I still had "Free Bird" and "My Way" scheduled, then he just showed up. I wanted his first song to be "Where the Streets Have No Name," since that was the first song I played for his playlist, so I gave him the lil' triple feature at like 4 AM or something on the morning of his birth, with U2, Skynyrd and Sinatra. Not a bad way to start off one's mortality, if you ask me.

Here's his full, 75-song playlist, if you're looking for some sweet tunes to help you make it through your day:

Condensed Playlist

Finally, I've condensed my Top 100 songs of 2023 down to 50 of my favorites, including all of the Top 10. Feel free to pop in some earbuds and take a listen.

And that brings us to the end of another glorious Spotify Wrapped blog. Did you find any new music that you liked? Has this information totally changed your perception of who I am, as a person and a friend? What were some of your top songs and artists of the year? How many minutes did you crank out? Let me know in the comments, follow me on Twitter (here and here) or come bug me on Facebook. I'm not a hard man to find.

Until next time.

MLB TV Viewing Stats - 2023

 

This is my sixth year of posting my MLB TV stats, so I'm going to shorten a lot of my long-winded explanations of what I do, how I do it, and what all this stuff means. Every time I watch a baseball game through my MLB TV subscription, I use a Google Docs spreadsheet to keep track of some stats about every game. This post will break all of that useless information down.

Welcome, friends, and thank you for joining me.

Stats Tracked on the Spreadsheet:

Nothing changed on my spreadsheet this year. Again, here's what I kept track of for each game that I watched:

• Road team
• Home team
• Broadcast (which team's TV feed I tuned into)
• Winning team
• W/L result of the team whose broadcast I watched
• Duration of viewing
• 1-2 innings: "Minimal"
• 3-4 innings: "Partial"
• 5-7 innings: "Most"
• 8-9 innings: "Full"
• Any interesting notes about the game

Persisting Factors that Affected Viewing Habits:

• All Arizona Diamondback and Colorado Rockies games are blacked out in Utah. It makes no sense.
• Any nationally televised games (FOX, ESPN, TBS, etc.) are not viewable on MLB TV.
• I work from home and have two young children whose first priority of entertainment is not watching sports.

Untracked Games:

• I cannot recall any games that I watched that were not broadcast on MLB TV. Also somewhat of note, for the first time in several years, I did not attend an MLB game in person.

Total Number of Games Watched and Cost Per Game:

• This year, I'm going to spare you all the math I put into these calculations, but it suffices me to say that if all 30 Major League teams play 162 games a season, and if each single game counts as two "games played" (one game for the home team and one game for the road team), that equals a total of 4,860 games played.
• Accounting for the idiotic regional blackouts of the Arizona Diamondbacks and Colorado Rockies, as well as nationally televised games, I have been lowering the maximum amount of games I would have had access to down to 4,356 games per season.
• I watched a total of 51 baseball games this season, or a total of 102 "games played."
• This is six fewer games than I watched in 2022.
• Based on the approximate number of 4,356 "games played" that I had access to, I watched about 2.3% of those games, a 0.3% decrease from last year.
• This year's MLB season ran from March 30 - October 1, a duration of 186 days.
• Last year, I lowered the maximum number of games that I could reasonably have watched per day to one, which I think is totally reasonable. Of course, there were probably days when I might have watched part of multiple games, but that would definitely have been the exception, not the rule.
• I watched a total of 51 games throughout the 186-day season, which is 27% of the maximum number of games that I reasonably could have watched - a minor dip from how much I watched last year.
• Here is the evolution of that percentage since 2018:
• 2018: 11%
• 2019: 26%
• 2020: 29%
• 2021: 17%
• 2022: 31%
• 2023: 27%
• Unlike last year, I unfortunately did not split the cost of MLB TV with my brother. (Long story short, we found out that he got it for free through T-Mobile the day after I my subscription automatically renewed. Bummer.) By dividing the cost of my subscription by the number of games that I watched, the math comes out to $2.94 per game - in the neighborhood of triple what I was paying per game last year and easily my worst ratio since I started keeping track of these ridiculous statistics.
• Here is how my cost-per-game ratio has developed over the years:
• 2018: $2.85/game
• 2019: $1.85/game
• 2020: $1.97/game
• 2021: $1.83/game
• 2022: $1.14/game
• 2023: $2.94/game

Duration of Viewing:

The following is a breakdown of how long I typically watched each game, based on the definitions previously discussed, in order of duration:

• Most: 21 games (41%)
• Partial: 14 games (27%)
• Full: 11 games (22%)
• Minimal: 5 games (10%)

Times Watched on the Team's Local Broadcast (Out of 51 Games Watched):

Here is the leaderboard for how many times I intentionally tuned into a team's local broadcast:

1. Texas Rangers: 21
2. Tampa Bay Rays: 10
3. Cincinnati Reds: 3
   Seattle Mariners: 3
4. Miami Marlins: 2
   Washington Nationals: 2
5. Chicago Cubs: 1
   Detroit Tigers: 1
   Houston Astros: 1
   Los Angeles Angels: 1
   New York Mets: 1
   New York Yankees: 1
   Philadelphia Phillies: 1
   San Diego Padres: 1
   San Francisco Giants: 1
   Toronto Blue Jays: 1
   

Times Watched (Total, Out of 102 Total Teams Watched):

Once again, I watched 26 out of the 30 teams play this year. The four teams I didn't watch were the Arizona Diamondbacks and Colorado Rockies (as always), the Minnesota Twins and the Los Angeles Dodgers (who I apparently have a habit of never watching). Here is a breakdown of how many times I watched all of the other teams play, regardless of which broadcast I tuned into:

1. Texas Rangers: 21
2. Tampa Bay Rays: 10
3. Seattle Mariners: 6
4. Chicago White Sox: 5
   Toronto Blue Jays: 5
   Washington Nationals: 5
5. Boston Red Sox: 4
   Miami Marlins: 4
6. Cincinnati Reds: 3
   Cleveland Guardians: 3
   Detroit Tigers: 3
   Los Angeles Angels: 3
   New York Mets: 3
   Oakland A's: 3
   Philadelphia Phillies: 3
7. Baltimore Orioles: 2
   Chicago Cubs: 2
   Houston Astros: 2
   Milwaukee Brewers: 2
   San Francisco Giants: 2
8. Kansas City Royals: 1
   New York Yankees: 1
   Pittsburgh Pirates: 1
   San Diego Padres: 1
   St. Louis Cardinals: 1

Overall Win/Loss Record:

• This year, teams I tuned in to watch went 25-26, which felt a lot worse than it actually was. The surprising thing is that my top two teams this year were the Texas Rangers and the Tampa Bay Rays, who were two of the best teams in the league all year long, so I would have anticipated watching a few more wins. Sadly, that wasn't the case, and I watched some pretty good teams lose a lot of winnable games. Thankfully, it wasn't quite as miserable as last year.
• Running W/L percentage tracker:
• 2018: .534
• 2019: .625
• 2020: .410
• 2021: .492
• 2022: .404
• 2023: .490

Home/Road Split:

Editor's note: I said last year that this was, inexplicably, the most difficult category for me to calculate, but I got it right this year on my first try. I am proud. The home/road W-L numbers are tricky, though. I made some changes to my spreadsheet so that it's hopefully a little easier next year.

• Of the 51 games I tuned into during 2023, the team I wanted to watch played 24 home games (47%) and 27 road games (53%).
• When I watched a team's home broadcast, that team went 14-10 (.583).
• When I watched a team's road broadcast, that team went 11-16 (.407).
• Regardless of whose broadcast I watched, the home team went 30-21 (.588).
• Regardless of whose broadcast I watched, the road team went 21-30 (.411).

W/L Records for Teams Whose Broadcast I Watched:

1. Detroit Tigers: 1-0 (1.000)
   Los Angeles Angels: 1-0 (1.000)
   Philadelphia Phillies: 1-0 (1.000)
   San Diego Padres: 1-0 (1.000)
2. Tampa Bay Rays: 6-4 (.600)
3. Texas Rangers: 12-9 (.571)
4. Washington Nationals: 1-1 (.500)
5. Cincinnati Reds: 1-2 (.333)
   Seattle Mariners: 1-2 (.333)
6. Chicago Cubs: 0-1 (.000)
   Houston Astros: 0-1 (.000)
   New York Mets: 0-1 (.000)
   New York Yankees: 0-1 (.000)
   San Francisco Giants: 0-1 (.000)
   Toronto Blue Jays: 0-1 (.000)
   Miami Marlins: 0-2 (.000)

W/L Records for Every Team I Watched, Regardless of Broadcast:

1. Milwaukee Brewers: 2-0 (1.000)
   Pittsburgh Pirates: 1-0 (1.000)
   San Diego Padres: 1-0 (1.000)
2. Atlanta Braves: 3-1 (.750)
3. Detroit Tigers: 2-1 (.666)
   Los Angeles Angels: 2-1 (.666)
   New York Mets: 2-1 (.666)
   Philadelphia Phillies: 2-1 (.666)
4. Tampa Bay Rays: 6-4 (.600)
   Chicago White Sox: 3-2 (.600)
5. Texas Rangers: 12-9 (.571)
6. Houston Astros: 2-2 (.500)
   Miami Marlins: 2-2 (.500)
   Baltimore Orioles: 1-1 (.500)
   Chicago Cubs: 1-1 (.500)
   San Francisco Giants: 1-1 (.500)
7. Toronto Blue Jays: 2-3 (.400)
8. Seattle Mariners: 2-4 (.333)
   Cleveland Guardians: 1-2 (.333)
   Cincinnati Reds: 1-2 (.333)
   Oakland A's: 1-2 (.333)
9. Washington Nationals: 1-4 (.200)
10. Kansas City Royals: 0-1 (.000)
    New York Yankees: 0-1 (.000)
    St. Louis Cardinals: 0-1 (.000)
    Boston Red Sox: 0-4 (.000)

Miscellaneous Stats or Other Interesting Things That Happened:

• I saw big comebacks, I saw big chokes. I turned games off early and missed big comebacks and big chokes. I watched extra innings wins and suffered through extra innings losses. It's the circle of life.
• I saw a Brewers player hit a grand slam for his first major league home run.
• I saw a Rangers player get hit in the face by a pitch.
• I watched the Rangers beat the Orioles at the hospital with my newborn son.
• I watched the Rays tie Modern Era record for winning streak to start the season (13 games) and then watched them lose the next game, failing to break that record.
• I also saw the Rangers and Mariners snap eight-game win streaks, because I'm just such a good luck charm
• I watched a game on Jackie Robinson Day, the Fourth of July and Labor Day.
• I saw some weird stuff, like when Vlad Guerrero Jr. threw his entire mitt to first base for an out after a grounder got stuck in his webbing, and when the Reds hit a "little league home run."
• And - something I never thought I'd see - I watched Max Scherzer's debut for the Texas Rangers.

Final Thoughts:

Two things stick out: I didn't split the cost of the subscription this year, which essentially doubled my cost-per-game from the get-go, and I just didn't watch as much baseball this year as I wanted to or probably could have. Parenthood, man. Parenthood. There are just more important things that I need to be doing with my life, other than just watching baseball at all times. That, and I sometimes just get outvoted or overruled about what goes on the big TV. That's life, and that's ok.

But next year, I better either split the cost or just watch like a dozen more games to make me feel better about myself.

And... we'll see ya then, probably.

Go Rangers!

FanX 2023: John Rhys-Davies recalls working with the Tabernacle Choir

One of the true unexpected delights of FanX Salt Lake Comic Convention 2023 was the opportunity to interview acclaimed actor John Rhys-Davies, who is best known for his roles in Lord of the Rings and Indiana Jones. He made himself available to speak to the media before the convention opened for its first day on September 21 and couldn't have been kinder to us. He even offered to take selfies with us when we were done chatting.

Because FanX took place in the midst of the SAG-AFTRA strike, we were not permitted to ask any of the actors about their work - past, present or future - which meant we couldn't ask him about Gimli or Sala or anything else he'd done in Hollywood, and we had to get a little creative with our questions.

One thing that was not off limits, however, was Rhys-Davies' experience performing with the Tabernacle Choir at Temple Square; he was a guest for the choir's Christmas concert in 2013. When we asked him to recall his time spent with the choir, he had some nice things to say.

Well, I knew of the Tabernacle Choir, really, from very early on. I’m a Welshman, and I spent time in a little village in Wales when my parents were out in Africa. The one choir that everyone knew of and admired was the Mormon Tabernacle Choir.

I did the Christmas show a number of years back. I expected to be impressed by the musicianship, and Mack [Wilberg] is […] probably the greatest choral authority in the world, I think, and I love him immensely and admire him immensely. The choir is superb – the musicianship, the range of their musical interests is enormous – and, as I’m a classical music fan, obviously, it was a match made in heaven, as far as I was concerned. 

But the welcome you get… I will be staying on for the service ["Music and the Spoken Word"] on Sunday [September 24], and I had the great privilege of attending the 95^th birthday of your prophet, who stood up and made one of the most moving and articulate speeches that I think I’ve ever heard. Wonderful man. 

To an outsider, on first coming in, you’re a rather strange community, but the more I come, the more I see the real strengths of the community. The measure of friendliness to strangers is really unmatched. You’re a warm, welcoming, intelligent, rational, committed community, and I love it here.

Social media posts by some in attendance at "Music and the Spoken Word" can confirm that Rhys-Davies and fellow LOTR alum Andy Serkis were present to hear the Tabernacle Choir perform that Sunday, following the convention. So hey, how about that? Pretty cool.

For more FanX content, you know where to keep it.

Until next time.

FanX Flashback - Giancarlo Esposito Panel Highlights (FanX22)

As we gear up for FanX 2023 - the 10-year anniversary of the convention, which is crazy - I thought it would be a good time to transcribe another panel or two from last year and put it out into the blog-o-sphere. I felt that Giancarlo Esposito put on the best panel of the weekend, so it pains me that I waited so long to publish this one. I thought he did a masterful job of taking the cliche convention questions ("Do you have a funny story about so-and-so? Did you ever steal something from a set? What has been your favorite role?" Stuff like that...) and turning his responses into teaching opportunities. I didn't capture all of his words of wisdom, but did boot up my recorder to catch a few great moments.

A fan asks Esposito whether he enjoyed working more on “Breaking Bad” or “Better Call Saul.”

I love the comparisons. They both are favorite shows of mine, for different reasons. I love that in “Breaking Bad,” I could come in for four or five days and really… For an actor who does… I come from theater, and then I moved into television, then I moved into film. Film is a continuum – you’re doing two pages a day. Television, you’re doing six pages a day. And in order for an actor to get a run on what he does, it’s always good to have your work put together so you can focus.

See, focus in life is really important. Asking for what you want is also important. We sometimes feel that we don’t have the power to ask questions when you’re hired to do a job because you may be new – it may be your first day or second day. How often do you go to a job interview and you’re asked all these questions – how often do you ask a question? “What do you have to offer me? How can I help your organization run in a way that’s different. What do you see in me that could help bring your business a new energy and a more empowered or more inspired way of working?” So, for me, I feel like that’s my position in life, and I realized that to ask for what I want is important because I want to be a contributor. I want to contribute to what I do.

So, I loved both shows – “’Breaking Bad” because I was so able to focus my energy and attention, come in four or five days, do my work, pinpoint it, have them be inspired with what I do, get on a plane and go out, come back in another two weeks and do the same thing again. But I asked for my work to be put together so I could feel like I had the engine behind me. In “BetterCall Saul,” I spent more time on the set, which was great. But I also was able to cultivate a more sensitive, vulnerable and astute Gus [Fring – his character on both shows] because he had a problem – a problem that was very specific. “Saul,” as a show, was more specific than “Breaking Bad” because it was about Jimmy. Right? It was about Gene, Jimmy, Saul… Good-man… right?

The focus… you have to know who you are within what you do and what you’re being asked to do. So go back to the job interview – how often are you asked, or do you ask, “What is my position here? What would you like me to do here? What is my strong point, my strength and my talent?” When you ask those questions of yourself, you will be put in the perfect position that is right for you in anything that you do. I say that what you do today determines your tomorrow. There’s no doubt in my mind about this. How you envision your life is how it will be. How you see it is how you then begin to create it.

Both of these shows are great for me, for different reasons, and I had different experiences related to those reasons because I started to see and say to myself, “What is the experience that I wanna have?” What is that experience? You see it, you create it – what you think grows. What you think grows.

A fan asks which of Esposito’s villainous characters is the most evil.

Another very interesting question – and it’s a difficult question for me to answer because I believe, and I think the success of the villains that I have played are because I inherently have thought that the anti-hero, the villain, is simply the fallen hero. That fallen hero is someone who feels that they are unseen, that they aren’t given credit for what they are, that they have to take a different route because no one is listening to them, that their ego is too big – insurmountable – for them to get beyond that they use force to get what they want. I feel like… which ones are evil? None of them are inherently evil, but then they take a road that guides them and leads them to being evil. You haven’t seen Season 3 of “Star Wars” yet – of “The Mandalorian” [at the time of the convention] – but even without seeing it, I have to say that hubris, the great word, that we [Moff Gideon] start to feel a little powerful and we want more. People start to listen and bow down to us and we want more, and then we start to want more and more until we start to have the power to control that becomes out of our control. So, if anyone is connected more to evil, I think it’s Moff Gideon than anyone.

Esposito responds to rumors that Marvel planned to cast him as Professor X.

I have to say, I love what Marvel does. I say it when I’m asked this question, always. I know some folks on the TV side and it sort of got out there that I talked to them a few years back, and that blew into, “Oh, he’s talking to them, he’s going to be at the [convention], they’re going to announce it,” all these things… Professor X was the last character to come up. I am fascinated by other characters in their universe, in their world, and I have to say: Magneto is one of them. [Audience cheers] Yeah, baby! I have to say: Freeze is another. I’m intrigued by the kind of majestic feeling of Freeze trapped in what he’s trapped in. I like that whole concept. I don’t know what it will be; I know that one day, Marvel is gonna hit for me, and I’m going to have a great time doing it. So, whatever that is, I’m hoping that they will be as excited as I am to work on something together.

Esposito tells a story about teaching his young daughter that he and the characters he plays are not the same person.

…That’s Gustavo Fring, and that’s not me. That’s someone else. So, whatever he does, that’s Gustavo, and this is your father. Well, the lights went down and, you know, I did a very ugly deed in [“Breaking Bad” Season] 4 [Episode] 01 “Box Cutter,” and the whole episode was galvanizing for her; she never took her eyes off the screen. She turned to me when the lights came back up. Without skipping a beat, she said, “Good kill, Papa.” [Audience gasps, laughs and applauds] I was just mortified! And then she went away - she had a couple more days of being with me in Albuquerque - and then she went home and she started watching the series from the beginning. She said, “This is such great storytelling, great filmmaking, I’m hooked.” But I swear, she never looked at me the same way again. [Audience laughs]

Esposito, on the importance of paying attention to those around us.

When we start to come back to who we really are, and we start to imbibe the gift that will never go away, ‘cause all it takes it to be able to listen and really hear – not just with your ears – with your heart, with your eyes, with your whole body – then, inspiration comes, and the right answer is always at the tip of your tongue because it’s organically the truth. It’s time for us to pay attention to each other again.

*****

Do you have a favorite Giancarlo Esposito role? We loved hearing him as Baxter Stockman in the recently released "TMNT: Mutant Mayhem," and really enjoyed the very un-family friendly Netflix series "Kaleidoscope." Leave us a comment below, follow us on Twitter (here and here) or hit us up on Facebook.

We're looking forward to FanX 2023 in a couple weeks. Are you going? There's still time to grab your tickets for what will undoubtedly be one of the biggest conventions in the history of the Beehive State.

Surely, we'll be back after the convention to post highlights from some of our favorite panels. Until then, keep it tuned here.

Until next time.

Love to See It: WWE edition

Believe it or not - and this may shock you - we're not going to have AI write this blog. Yeah, we hope you were sitting down for that. As our collective think tank was hard at work last night, we had an idea and we wanted to give it a shot. The new idea is called "Love to See It." We're going to make a couple lists of things we love to see, things we don't love to see and things that we would love to see. If the sparks catch fire, we may come back and do this again with different topics, from time to time. We'll see how it goes.

Today, we're going to take stock of the current state of World Wrestling Entertainment and talk about things we love to see in WWE.

Love to See It:

LA Knight:

We love LA Knight right now. Basically anything he does lately has been great. The man is arguably the best superstar on the mic and has garnered a massive wave of fan support in the past few months. Check out his glorious promo with The Miz on last night's Monday Night RAW:

Get LA Knight a belt, and make it happen soon.

Iyo Sky's Money in the Bank cash-in:

SummerSlam 2023 had its ups and downs, but one of the best moments of the night came when Iyo Sky successfully cashed in her Money in the Bank briefcase. This came hot on the heels of Bianca Belair surprisingly pinned then-champion Asuka after limping her way back to the ring following an apparent, brutal injury.

Bianca smiled through her (kayfabe) pain as she was crowned the new women's champion, but her joy was short-lived. Sky's ominous entrance music hit and she and Bayley bolted to the ring. At that point, it was all over but the crying. Bayley provided back-up by fending off Asuka and Charlotte Flair (who also competed in the triple threat match), and Io took to the skies with a colossal moonsault to pin Belair and win her first women's title on the main roster.

There's nothing more thrilling than a successful MITB cash-in, and this provided a momentary glimpse of joy before Roman Reigns successfully retained his heavyweight title over Jey Uso in the lackluster conclusion to last weekend's Premium Live Event.

Surging popularity of the Alpha Academy:

It took us a while, but we finally came around on Chad Gable. His "Shoosh" gimmick was hilarious as soon as he started doing it. His smarter-than-you schtick grew on us months and months ago, and his recruitment and mentorship of Otis has been an odd couple routine that we never before knew that we needed. (If you've ever seen Otis at a live event, the dude is absolutely hysterical.)

It seems that the Alpha Academy, with new recruit Maxxine Dupri, has finally won over the rest of the WWE audience, with Gable picking up a huge hometown win to earn the number one contendership for the Intercontinental championship on Monday night. Of course, we know that there is no way Gable will beat the seemingly invincible Gunther for the belt, but it was fun to see the crowd fully behind the Academy, at long last.

uh-THANK YEWWWWWW!

Don't Love to See It:

The Bloodline:

We acknowledged Roman Reigns as Tribal Chief and Head of the Table for a good long while. He was truly at the top of his game and became someone we couldn't help but love to hate. Things have changed, however.

We're sick of the five-minute walk to the ring. The "Acknowledge Me" promos have grown stale. His matches are boring and always end in him cheating to retain. Yeah, we get it - that's his character. The guy has so much family support that somebody will always be there to help him get the W. But it has gone on way too long, at this point. WWE had the perfect opportunity to let Roman drop the strap and head off on a well-deserved year-and-a-half-long vacation when he faced Cody Rhodes at Wrestlemania, but they had him win there (much, much, much to our utter dismay). The next logical time for him to lose would have been at SummerSlam, but we knew there was no way that Jey Uso, of all people, would be the guy to beat him for the championship. There was no way that was going to happen.

What happened on Saturday night, though, was probably the most illogical, stupid thing they possibly could have come up with. Why on earth would Jimmy Uso (who we knew was going to show up, in some capacity) return to betray Jey and help Roman win? If you've been following the three-year Bloodline saga, especially recently, that makes absolutely ZERO sense.

Anyway, whatever. It happened and I guess they're running with it. But now, we don't think Roman's going to lose until next Wrestlemania (if even then!). It's ridiculous, it's boring, and it's gone on way, way, way too long. Please, Triple H, PLEASE just end this storyline.

Charlotte Flair jumping the line:

Charlotte Flair taking months off and returning to work for an immediate title shot - name a more iconic duo. You can't. They go legitimately hand in hand. There's a reason why Charlotte has won so many championships: because she wins the belt, holds it for like two months, loses, goes on vacation and comes back to immediately win the title back. It's stupid. And she even acknowledged it a few weeks ago when she most recently returned! She knows it and we all know it. She says that she doesn't wait in line, that she is the line and that she basically deserves title shots whenever she feels like it. Ridiculous.

We couldn't have been happier that Charlotte (and Bianca, for that matter) didn't leave SummerSlam as champion, because we've seen those two face and defeat basically every other woman on the roster. Thankfully, with Io Sky as champion, we'll get some completely fresh rivalries, so that will be nice.

The Viking Raiders:

Like, is anybody even remotely threatened by these guys? They're good for a potty break, if you need one. You can pretty much fast forward through anything that involves them. For as intimidating as they should be (especially with freaky Valhalla by their side), it's just silly how much they lose. We wouldn't mind it if they disappeared from the main roster sometime soon. Go wreak havoc down on NXT or something. Just get them off our screens on Mondays and Fridays. We've had enough.

Would Love to See It:

A team-up of The Miz and Grayson Waller:

We respect The Miz. He worked his butt off to get where he is and has settled in as a solid, dependable guy to take on any celebrity matches. He's great on the mic and thrives on the hatred of the WWE Universe.

We hate Grayson Waller. Can't stand the guy, honestly.

But please, for the love of it, put those two together as a tag team. They would be hilarious and, if the SummerSlam battle royal was any indication, could probably work together pretty well in the ring. They'd instantly be a top heel tag team and would pose an actual threat to Sami Zayn and Kevin Owens' current title reign.

Finn Balor turning on the Judgment Day:

It's got to happen. It's got to happen soon.

We liked the Judgment Day when they first started out. Edge, Damian Priest and Rhea Ripley... that was good stuff. Then they added Finn Balor and kicked out Edge, and that was ok. Things started heading south when they added Dominic Mysterio (BOOOOOOOO), who literally just sucks at everything and is, by a long shot, the most hated WWE superstar in recent memory. The fans still love Rhea, but Finn has looked weak for months (he should never fight Seth Rollins ever again, by the way) and Priest was a disappointing MITB winner.

What would have been great would have been for Finn to have beaten Seth Rollins at SummerSlam, then have Priest cash in on Finn. That would have been juicy. That would have been spicy. But they didn't do that and, instead, just had Finn and Priest kind of awkwardly fumble around the briefcase and stare seethingly at each other.

They planted more seeds of a Judgment Day break-up on Monday night, even going so far as having JD McDonagh say that Priest should get rid of his briefcase, which has been the root of so much inner turmoil lately. Having Finn turn face and leave the Judgment Day would be the best possible outcome, in our opinion. Rhea should also break away from Dom, who has largely watered down what should have otherwise been an absurdly dominant women's title reign. We mean, what does Rhea actually do these days, other than whisper in Dom's ear and threaten to beat up men?

Break 'em up.

Johnny Gargano doing... anything?:

We were excited when Johnny Wrestling got called up to the main roster. But since then, what has he done? Almost nothing, right? He was sort of involved with the Dexter Lumis stalker storyline that ended up being some spin-off of The Miz trying to hire a bodyguard or something, but that's really about it. He went down and had a fight on NXT for a second. Give him a main roster title shot. Reunite him with Tommaso Ciampa, who has also had a disappointing run on RAW. Just have Gargano do something. We'd love to see it.

*****

What do you think about the current state of WWE? What's good? What's bad? Let us know in the comments below, on Twitter (here and here) or on Facebook. Also, keep an eye out for us at Monday Night RAW in Salt Lake City in September. We'll have a sign and we'll be right in the "TV Zone." Mama, we're gonna be on TV again!

Until next time.

Bing AI writes 'Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade' as a children's book

Deeply invested in parenthood and the youth of tomorrow are we, here at Signs of the Times: Underground. One of our favorite things to do at night is read our kids children's versions of our favorite movies. Right now, we're big into Back to the Future with our kids. We wondered if AI would be able to write us a simplified, kid-friendly version of Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade. Of course, it did a pretty good job, and we might have to read this one to our little ones in a coming day. We made a few minor tweaks to grammar and punctuation, but other than that, what you're about to read was all AI. Take a seat and enjoy!

** INDIANA JONES AND THE LAST CRUSADE: THE CHILDREN'S BOOK **

Indiana Jones is a brave adventurer who loves to explore ancient places and find hidden treasures. He learned to be an explorer from his father, Henry Jones, who is also a professor of history and knows a lot about the past.

One day, Indiana receives a package from his father, who has been missing for a while. The package contains his father’s diary, which has clues to the location of the Holy Grail, a special cup that can give eternal life to anyone who drinks from it. Indiana decides to follow his fathers trail and find the Holy Grail before the bad guys do. The bad guys are called Nazis, and they want to use the Holy Grail for evil purposes.

Indiana travels to Venice, Italy, where he meets Elsa, a beautiful lady who helps him find the entrance to an underground library that has a secret map to the Holy Grail. But Elsa is not really a friend; she is working for the Nazis and she betrays Indiana. Indiana escapes from the library and finds out that his father is being held prisoner in a castle in Austria.

Indiana goes to rescue his father, but he is captured by the Nazis, too. They take him and his father to a desert in the Middle East. They have found the Temple of the Sun, where the Holy Grail is hidden. The temple has three challenges that anyone who wants to reach the Holy Grail must pass: a path of blades, a word puzzle, and a leap of faith.

Indiana manages to pass all three challenges with his father's help, and he enters the chamber where the Holy Grail is kept. There are many cups there, but only one is the real one. A wise old knight guards the cups and tells Indiana to choose wisely. Elsa tries to pick the fanciest cup, thinking it is the Holy Grail, but she is wrong and she dies. Indiana picks the simplest cup, which is the right one, and he uses it to heal his father, who has been wounded by a bullet.

Indiana and his father leave the temple with their friends Marcus and Sallah, but they have to leave the Holy Grail behind, because it belongs there and it cannot be taken away. They ride away on horses, happy that they have found each other and shared an amazing adventure.

THE END

How'd that go? What other grown-up stories would you like AI to turn into a children's book? Let us know in the comments, find us on Twitter - or X or whatever it's called now - (here and here) or find us on Facebook.

Until next time.

Bing AI writes The Legend of Zelda: Shattered Power

As our AI-written video game The Legend of Zelda: Shattered Illusions drew to a close, Link had defeated the Illusionist and order appeared to have been restored to a twisted version of Hyrule. However, in the distance, a mysterious figure had his eye on our Hylian hero. The story continues as Bing AI helps us create a direct sequel called The Legend of Zelda: Shattered Power.

**The Legend of Zelda: Shattered Power**

Link is enjoying a peaceful life in Hyrule, until he receives a mysterious message from Zelda, who tells him that the Triforce of Power has been shattered and stolen by a new enemy, who calls himself the Chaos Lord. The Chaos Lord is using the Triforce of Power to create portals to other worlds, where he unleashes his army of monsters and wreaks havoc. Zelda asks Link to help her stop the Chaos Lord and recover the Triforce of Power, before he destroys everything. Link sets out on a new adventure, where he reunites with his animal companions Flick, Shell, and Blaze, and meets some new allies, such as a robot named Spark, a fairy named Twinkle, and a pirate captain named Jack. Link travels to different worlds, such as a futuristic city, a haunted graveyard, a tropical island, and a medieval castle, where he faces new challenges and enemies. He also learns more about the Chaos Lord’s origin and motive, and discovers that he has a personal connection to him. Link must use his courage, wisdom, and power to defeat the Chaos Lord and save the worlds from his evil plan.

Some of the new challenges and enemies are:

• In the futuristic city, Link has to deal with robots, lasers, and security systems. He also has to avoid being detected by the Chaos Lord's spies, who are disguised as humans. He faces a boss fight against a giant mech, controlled by the Chaos Lord's second-in-command, a cyborg named Metal.
• In the haunted graveyard, Link has to overcome his fears and fight against ghosts, zombies, and skeletons. He also has to solve puzzles and find clues to uncover the secrets of the graveyard. He faces a boss fight against a vampire lord, who is the Chaos Lord's ally and the ruler of the undead.
• In the tropical island, Link has to explore the jungle and the beach, where he encounters exotic animals and plants. He also has to deal with pirates, who are after the treasure hidden on the island. He faces a boss fight against a giant octopus, who is guarding the Triforce piece of Power on the island.
• In the medieval castle, Link has to infiltrate the castle and rescue Zelda, who has been captured by the Chaos Lord. He also has to fight against knights, archers, and wizards. He faces a boss fight against the Chaos Lord himself, who is wielding the Triforce of Power and has transformed into a monstrous form.

Some of Link's skills, weapons and experiences carry over from the first game, "Shattered Illusions." For example, Link still has the Master Sword, which he can use to dispel the Chaos Lord’s illusions and break his defenses. [However,] Link cannot [exclusively] use the Master Sword for the entire game. The Master Sword is a powerful weapon, but it also has a drawback: it drains Link’s energy when he uses it. Link has to be careful not to overuse the Master Sword, or he will become exhausted and vulnerable. He has to balance the use of the Master Sword with other weapons and items, depending on the situation. He also has to find ways to restore his energy, such as eating food, drinking potions, or resting. The Master Sword is a valuable tool, but it is not a solution for everything.

[Additionally, Link's animal companions from the first game] can help him with their abilities and personalities. He also has some of the items and weapons that he obtained in the first game, such as the bow, the boomerang, the hookshot, and the bombs. However, he also has to learn new skills and find new items and weapons to adapt to the different worlds and situations.

Some of the new weapons or powers that Link uses in this game are:

• A laser gun, which he finds in the futuristic city. It can fire beams of energy that can damage or stun enemies. It can also be used to activate switches and open doors.
• A magic wand, which he finds in the haunted graveyard. It can cast spells of fire, ice, or lightning, depending on the color of the gem on the wand. It can also be used to light up dark areas or melt ice.
• A coconut bomb, which he finds on the tropical island. It can be thrown at enemies or obstacles, causing a large explosion. It can also be used to create distractions or lure enemies into traps.
• A shield gauntlet, which he finds in the medieval castle. It can be used to block attacks or deflect projectiles. It can also be used to charge at enemies or break through walls.

The most shocking moment of the story is when Link discovers the personal connection between him and the Chaos Lord. He learns that the Chaos Lord is actually his long-lost brother, who was kidnapped and corrupted by the Illusionist in the first game. The Illusionist used the Triforce of Wisdom to manipulate and brainwash him, turning him into his loyal servant and giving him a fragment of the Triforce of Power. The Chaos Lord hates Link for abandoning him and wants to destroy everything that he loves. Link is shocked and saddened by this revelation, but he also feels a glimmer of hope that he can save his brother from the Illusionist's influence. He tries to reason with him and remind him of their past, but the Chaos Lord is too far gone and attacks him with rage. Link has to fight his own brother, while also trying to reach his heart and free him from the Illusionist's control.

The final battle between Link and the Chaos Lord is a fierce and emotional confrontation. The Chaos Lord uses the full power of the Triforce of Power, creating a storm of chaos and destruction around him. He also summons his army of monsters and illusions to attack Link. Link has to use the Master Sword, his animal companions, his weapons, and his items to fight back and reach the Chaos Lord. He also has to use his courage, wisdom, and power to resist the Chaos Lord’s taunts and temptations. The battle takes place in a twisted version of Hyrule Castle, where the Chaos Lord has his throne. The battle has several phases, each one more difficult and intense than the previous one. The final phase is the most dramatic and climactic one, where Link and the Chaos Lord face each other in a one-on-one duel of swords and magic. Link has to use all his skills and determination to defeat the Chaos Lord and save his brother from the Illusionist’s control.

The final scene of the game is a touching and satisfying conclusion. Link manages to defeat the Chaos Lord and break the Illusionist’s control over him. He also manages to restore the Triforce of Power and reunite it with the Triforce of Wisdom and the Triforce of Courage, which he already has. He uses the power of the Triforce to close the portals to the other worlds and undo the damage caused by the Chaos Lord. He also uses the power of the Triforce to heal his brother and free him from the Illusionist's influence. He embraces his brother and apologizes for leaving him behind. His brother also apologizes for hurting him and thanks him for saving him. They forgive each other and reconcile. Zelda also joins them and congratulates Link for his heroic deeds. She also thanks him for rescuing her and restoring peace to Hyrule. She kisses him and tells him that she loves him. Link also tells her that he loves her. They hug and smile. Link's animal companions also join them and celebrate their victory. They thank Link for his friendship and tell him that they will always be there for him. Link also thanks them for their help and tells them that they are his best friends. They hug and laugh.

The Illusionist, who was defeated by Link in the first game, appears in a ghostly form and tries to attack them one last time, but he is stopped by the Triforce, which banishes him to a dark dimension, where he will be trapped forever. The game ends with a panoramic view of Hyrule, where everything is restored and peaceful. The sun is shining, the birds are singing, and the people are happy. A narration by Zelda says that Link has fulfilled his destiny as the Hero of Time, and that he will always be remembered as a legend. The credits roll, accompanied by a beautiful song.

 

THE END

*****

The Legend of Zelda: Shattered Power is Part 2 of an original video game series:

The Legend of Zelda: Shattered Illusions | The Legend of Zelda: Shattered Power

There you go! A nice little two-parter. What did you think? We'd love to get your thoughts in a comment on this post or, as always, you can follow us on Twitter (here and here) or try to look us up on Facebook.

Until next time.

Bing AI writes The Legend of Zelda: Shattered Illusions

We have occasionally felt bad for giving up on "The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild," which many have called the greatest modern video game of all time. We just couldn't with the breakable weapons. But here we are, years later, and we picked up "Breath of the Wild" on Prime Day to finally give it another chance. Truth be told, we're a couple days back into it and we're actually really having a good time, now that we've come to grips with the fact that pretty much every single one of those weapons and shields is going to break after about three minutes of use.

A few weeks ago, we asked our beloved Bing AI buddy to write a synopsis for a new Zelda game called "Shattered Illusions." He had no idea what that title meant, but it sounded cool at the time and we wanted to see what the AI would come up with. We also asked it a few clarifying questions and wanted more detail about some of the features in the game. Here's what we could be looking at with a new hypothetical story set in Hyrule:

**The Legend of Zelda: Shattered Illusions** 

Link wakes up in a strange world where nothing is as it seems. He discovers that he has been trapped in a twisted version of Hyrule by a mysterious villain who calls himself the Illusionist. The Illusionist has shattered the Triforce of Wisdom and scattered its pieces across the land, creating dangerous illusions that distort reality and threaten to destroy everything. Link must find and restore the Triforce of Wisdom, while facing his own fears and doubts, before the Illusionist can use it to unleash his ultimate plan: to erase Hyrule from existence and create a new world in his image.

Some of the illusions that Link encounters are:

• A dark forest where the trees come alive and attack him
• A frozen lake where he has to skate across thin ice while avoiding giant snowflakes
• A haunted mansion where he has to solve puzzles and escape from ghosts and zombies
• A desert oasis where he has to find water and avoid mirages and sandstorms
• A volcano where he has to climb up the lava flows and dodge falling rocks and fireballs

The strongest weapon in the game is the Master Sword, which Link obtains after he restores the Triforce of Wisdom. The Master Sword is the only weapon that can break through the Illusionist’s defenses and defeat him. The Master Sword also has the power to dispel illusions and reveal the truth. However, the Master Sword is not easy to wield, and Link has to prove himself worthy of it by passing several trials and tests.

[As in other recent Zelda games,] all of the weapons are breakable, except for the Master Sword. Link has to be careful not to use them too much or they will wear out and break. He can find new weapons or repair his old ones by visiting shops or finding materials. He can also upgrade his weapons by using special items or completing quests. Some weapons have special effects or abilities that can help Link in different situations, such as fire, ice, electricity, etc. 

There are some new animal companions for Link to travel with. One of them is a winged fox named Flick, who can fly and help Link reach high places and scout ahead. Another one is a giant turtle named Shell, who can swim and carry Link across water and shield him from attacks. The third one is a fire-breathing lizard named Blaze, who can burn obstacles and enemies and light up dark areas. Link can switch between them at any time and use their abilities to solve puzzles and explore the world.

There are some Easter eggs or connections to other Nintendo games. For example, Link can find a Mario hat and wear it as a costume, which gives him the ability to jump higher and stomp on enemies. He can also find a Metroid helmet and wear it as a costume, which gives him the ability to scan objects and fire missiles. He can also find a Pikmin whistle and use it to summon Pikmin to help him fight or carry items. There are also some references and nods to other Nintendo games in the dialogue, music, and scenery.

The final battle against the Illusionist is a challenging and epic showdown. The Illusionist will use his power to create multiple illusions of himself, each one with a different weapon and attack pattern. Link will have to use the Master Sword to dispel the illusions and find the real Illusionist, who will be hiding and casting spells from a distance. Link will also have to dodge the Illusionist’s attacks, which include fireballs, lightning bolts, ice shards, and dark energy blasts. Link will have to use his animal companions, his weapons, and his items to survive and counterattack. The battle will take place in a large arena that changes shape and appearance according to the Illusionist’s whims, such as a castle, a forest, a desert, a volcano, etc. The battle will have several phases, each one more difficult and intense than the previous one. The final phase will be the most dramatic and climactic one, where Link and the Illusionist will face each other in a one-on-one duel of swords and magic. Link will have to use all his skills and courage to defeat the Illusionist and save Hyrule from his evil plan.

The game [ends as] Link restores the Triforce of Wisdom, frees Hyrule from the Illusionist’s grip, and returns to his own world. He is hailed as a hero and reunited with his friends and family. He also says goodbye to his animal companions, who decide to stay in the twisted world and protect it from any future threats. The game ends with a celebration and a fireworks show, where Link and Zelda share a romantic moment. However, the game also teases a possible sequel, where a mysterious figure is seen watching Link from afar, holding a fragment of the Triforce of Power and smiling evilly.

 

TO BE CONTINUED... in The Legend of Zelda: Shattered Power!

*****

The Legend of Zelda: Shattered Illusions is Part 1 of an original video game series:

The Legend of Zelda: Shattered Illusions | The Legend of Zelda: Shattered Power

Of course, there's nothing stopping you from checking out the sequel right now, but if you have a second, you can leave us a comment, follow us on Twitter (here and here) or send a smoke signal in hopes of locating us.

Until next time!