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Showing posts with label Sports. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Sports. Show all posts

Tuesday, December 16, 2025

The Bitter Pill 6: John Cena Gives Up


For more than two decades, WWE superstar John Cena lived by a pair of three-word mottos: “Hustle, loyalty, respect” and “Never give up.” Across nearly 25 years, he granted hundreds of Make-a-Wish requests, served as the undisputed face of WWE, and crafted a heroic legacy that spanned multiple generations of fans.

In July 2024, Cena announced that he would retire at the end of 2025, breaking the hearts of millions of wrestling fans. Yet the announcement also sparked immediate intrigue. Who would Cena face on his way out? Old rivals? Dream matches? A final spotlight on rising talent?

Few could have predicted what followed.

Cena’s 18-match retirement tour featured several notable moments: a second-place finish in the Royal Rumble, a victory inside the Elimination Chamber, and the most shocking development of all: his long-awaited heel turn. After years of fan speculation, Cena finally embraced the dark side, aligning himself with The Rock and Travis Scott, stunning the wrestling world by delivering a low blow to Cody Rhodes at the conclusion of Elimination Chamber.



For years, fans begged to see the company’s white knight bend the rules but Cena always resisted, determined to preserve his family-friendly image. When it finally happened, it felt historic - although the storyline ultimately lacked follow-through once Dwayne and Travis unexpectedly vanished from television.

Still, the heel turn opened the door for fresh matchups for a few months. Cena squared off against top babyfaces including Cody Rhodes, CM Punk, Sami Zayn, and longtime admirer R-Truth. Along the way, he broke Ric Flair’s long-standing world championship record, capturing a historic seventeenth title. But without meaningful direction, Cena’s villain run always felt temporary and quickly ran out of steam, not to mention that fans continued to cheer him despite his dastardly deeds. Entertaining as it was, it seemed inevitable that he would finish his career the way he started it - as a hero.

Eventually, he did pivot back to his old, righteous character. After a brief, almost abrupt redemption, the WWE Universe welcomed him back with open arms. Cena closed out his tour with strong performances with and against familiar foes like AJ Styles, Sheamus, and Rey Mysterio. He even defeated Dominik Mysterio to capture the Intercontinental Championship - the only major title that had eluded him - officially making Cena a Grand Slam Champion in the twilight of his career.



His final opponent was decided via a 16-man “Last Time Is Now” tournament featuring WWE and NXT talent, along surprise appearances from ex-WWE stars Zack Ryder and Dolph Ziggler. From early on, rumors pointed toward Gunther as the scripted winner. Gunther, who returned from an injury that kept him out of action for several months, had already established himself as a multi-time champion and recently retired Goldberg in the summer of 2025, and a probably “career ender” reputation wouldn’t be an unrealistic angle.

For some fans – myself included - that outcome felt potentially underwhelming. Cena’s final match seemed better suited for a long-standing rival like Randy Orton or The Miz, or even an impossible dream opponent like Edge, who is currently contracted by WWE’s main rival, AEW. But the rumors proved true. Gunther won the tournament and earned the right to face John Cena in his retirement match at Saturday Night’s Main Event in Washington, D.C.

The match itself was fine. It wasn’t a highlight-reel classic like Cena’s bout with AJ Styles, nor was it a one-sided demolition like his loss to Brock Lesnar. As the tour progressed, Cena showed signs of slowing down - precisely the reason he chose to retire while still capable. He wasn’t bad; he was simply no longer prime Cena. Against a methodical opponent like Gunther, that worked. The slower pace fit the moment.

The crowd was firmly in Cena’s corner, louder and more unified than perhaps any audience of Cena’s storied career. There seemed to be a genuine belief that he could pull off one last victory.

Industry tradition suggests otherwise. Retirement matches are often about passing the torch, and legends typically go out on their backs, looking up at the lights. Ric Flair did it. Kurt Angle did it. Batista did it. The Undertaker did it. Goldberg lost consciousness in his last match with Gunther. That’s just how wrestling works.

But John Cena felt different. It felt like maybe - just maybe - WWE would let us see Cena’s hand raised one last time.

In the episode or two preceding Saturday Night’s Main Event, Gunther promised he would make Cena go against everything he preached; he promised to make Cena give up.

That idea alone felt wrong. The man whose entire career was built on “Never Give Up” was not going to tap out. Not in his final match.

Throughout the bout, Cena delivered his signature offense - the Five Knuckle Shuffle, the “five moves of doom,” and multiple Attitude Adjustments, including one through the announce table and another from the middle ropes. Gunther kicked out every time. He fought back relentlessly, chopping Cena down and repeatedly locking in the sleeper hold - the same move that ended Goldberg’s career.



Surely they weren’t going to make John Cena submit.

…Right?

As the match wore on, Cena struggled to stay upright, narrowly escaping defeat multiple times. The crowd roared, chanting “Don’t give up!” and unleashing venom toward Gunther, urging their hero onward.

But time and time again, Gunther cinched in that sleeper hold, and Cena started to fade. Finally, in a moment that will be talked about and debated for years to come, John Cena smiled.

And then, softly, he tapped out.

John Cena gave up.

This just felt wrong. Cena didn’t look overpowered. He didn’t look completely out of gas. He just looked tired - disappointed, even. Sad. The moment felt symbolic, as if Cena were quietly acknowledging, “My time is over. The job is done.”

This week on his social media accounts, Cena posted a captionless image of Obi-Wan Kenobi smiling just before being struck down by Darth Vader. The comparison spoke for itself.

The crowd, meanwhile, was stunned into near silence as Gunther’s hand was raised. A smattering of applause followed - more out of appreciation for Cena than appreciation of the moment itself - but it hardly resembled the sendoff WWE likely envisioned. Wrestlers soon filed to the ring, led by WWE Chief Content Officer Paul “Triple H” Levesque, who was met with loud boos and profanity-laced chants. The tonal shift was jarring: from Cena’s shocking defeat to Triple H laughing and grinning as he gestured toward the video board, where a triumphant highlight package of Cena’s career began to play.



Fans could do nothing but watch in disbelief as the curtain fell on an unrivaled career during a moment that should have felt triumphant but simply didn’t.

Yahoo! Sports journalist Ariel Helwani addressed Cena’s retirement on his podcast, The Ariel Helwani Show, pushing back against the familiar argument that this was “what wrestling tradition demands”:

“People will say, ‘This is what John wanted - he wanted to give back to the business.’ And to that I say that’s nonsense. That ideology belongs to wrestling in the ’70s and ’80s, not the era we’re living in now. Who wanted to see John Cena lose again and again in his final months? And not only does he lose his retirement match, but the guy who told us for over 20 years to never give up loses by submission. The match never should have been Cena vs. Gunther, and it sure as [expletive] never should have ended with Cena tapping out.”

Helwani also suggested that WWE may as well have told its audience, “You want this? Well, here’s the exact opposite.” During the match, fans loudly chanted “Super Cena,” a nickname once used mockingly by detractors who resented his seemingly invincible booking. On this night, however, the chant carried nostalgia and affection. The fans were trying to will him to victory. And what they received in return was a version of John Cena who abandoned the very mantra that defined his career, tapping out and exiting with a whimper.

Bleacher Report echoed that frustration, criticizing Cena’s retirement run as a whole and calling it a program that “largely missed the mark,” citing inconsistent storytelling, the failed heel turn, and a lack of meaningful payoff. What should have been a legacy-defining farewell instead became a wave of nostalgia filled with squandered opportunities.

The larger problem for WWE is that moments like this tend to linger with its audience. Last weekend, fans in Washington were taunting Gunther for having tapped out to Jey Uso at WrestleMania last April; there is little chance they’ll forget that he ended John Cena’s career via one of the most pathetic-looking tap-outs of all time.

WWE may be comfortable doubling down on the idea that this was “best for business,” and to Gunther’s credit, his character thrives in hostility. But Cena’s farewell wasn’t supposed to be about solidifying Gunther as a star. It was supposed to be about John Cena.

At a time when WWE is steadily pricing fans out of live events and television programming, the company had a chance to give its audience something simple and rare: a joyful goodbye. A victory lap. A final image worthy of the man who carried the brand for a generation.

The fans deserved better. John Cena deserved better. Instead, WWE chose an ending that undercut the very values its biggest star spent decades promoting.

I know it’s all part of the show - but for once, wouldn’t a happy ending have been enough?

Hustle, loyalty, respect. Never give up… unless it’s the final match of your career and the script says otherwise.



*****

The Bitter Pill is an ongoing series containing my thoughts on moments that make me wonder why I even watch sports (even the pre-determined ones) in the first place. For a nice jog down Pain Boulevard, read the other posts here. You can also try to find me on Facebook, follow me on Twitter (here and here), and explain why it's still real to you, dang it, in the comments section below.

Until next time.

Thursday, October 2, 2025

MLB TV Viewing Stats - 2025


It's hard to believe that it's already October! The calendar year is almost over, and so is the Major League Baseball season, which has officially entered the postseason! Three teams - the Guardians, the Padres and the Red Sox - were eliminated while I wrote this blog.

This was an odd year of baseball viewership for me, as I've realized that the more children I have, the less control I have over what's on the TV at any given point of the day. Regardless, I'm going to break things down the way I have in my past MLB TV blogs, which you can refer to here, if you have nothing else going on today. To prevent myself from having to re-explain my thought process about everything for the umpteenth time, I will assume that if you've made it this far into the post, you're either familiar with my work in prior years or that you went back and read some of the old posts and now have a pretty good idea what's going on.

Are you with me? Very well. Let's proceed.



Stats Tracked on the Spreadsheet:

I didn't change anything that I was tracking on my spreadsheet this year, compared to what I was doing in 2024. As a reminder, here are the things that I kept track of for every game that I watched:

  • Road team
  • Home team
  • Home or Road Broadcast
  • Winning team
  • W/L result of the team whose broadcast I watched
  • Duration of viewing
    • 1-2 innings: "Minimal"
    • 3-4 innings: "Partial"
    • 5-7 innings: "Most"
    • 8-9 innings: "Full"
  • Any interesting notes about the game (although I think I'm getting less particular about this, unless something truly strange or interesting takes place)

Persisting Factors that Affected Viewing Habits:

  • All broadcasts (including the opponent's broadcast options) for Arizona Diamondback and Colorado Rockies games are blacked out in Utah. As I have mentioned ad nauseum in the past, this is completely dumb.
  • Any nationally televised games (FOX, ESPN, TBS, etc.) are not viewable on MLB TV.
  • I work from home and now have three kids, so I basically can only but baseball on the big screen if the kids are 100% distracted by something else or if I'm trying to bore them to sleep, a tactic I successfully employed several times this season.
  • I've been married for six years, and we have a lot of other stuff that we like to do or watch that isn't some random baseball game that my wife probably doesn't care about at all. (But my wife is super awesome and if I said, "Hey, I'd like to watch some baseball tonight, if that's ok," she would be totally fine with it.)

Untracked Games:

Back in the day, I used to have this bucket list project where I was trying to make it to all of the MLB stadiums. I would go to games on a practically yearly basis. However, as previously mentioned, I have a family now, so... yeah, it's been a second. My last baseball trip was in 2022, and I have no idea when I'll be able to make it to another one. Maybe next year. I thought I was making some pretty good progress - I've been to 17 stadiums, after all - but at this rate, I'll be that cute 86-year-old man that the official MLB social media channels post about, saying, "This adorable old man finally made it to all 30 stadiums. Look at him go!"

Now, on to the fun stuff!

Total Number of Games Watched:

  • New year, same thought process: if all 30 Major League teams play 162 games a season, and if each single game counts as two "games played" (one game for the home team and one game for the road team), that equals a total of 4,860 games played.
    • Accounting for ReGiOnAl BlAcKoUtS of the Arizona Diamondbacks and Colorado Rockies, as well as nationally televised games, I have been lowering the maximum amount of games I would have had access to down to 4,356 games per season.
  • I watched a total of 35 baseball games this season, or a total of 70 "games played."
    • This is 26 fewer games than I watched in 2024. Yiiikes.
  • Based on the approximate number of 4,356 "games played" that I had access to, I watched about 1.6% of those games, a decrease of 0.8% from last year.
  • This year's MLB season ran from March 27 - September 28, a duration of 186 days. For the past two years, I have been using the guideline that I could "reasonably" watch one baseball game per day. At this point, the thought of me watching one baseball game every day for 186 days is completely insane. There is no way that I could do that. So I'm changing things up this year. I think if I was really kicking butt, I could probably watch maybe a maximum of four games in a single week. Most of the games that I have been able to watch were day games, and those generally only happen on Wednesdays and Thursdays, so it definitely wasn't a productive season for me, comparatively speaking. So... let's see how this shakes up my stats.
    • I watched a total of 35 games throughout the 186-day season. There are 26.5 weeks in 186 days. If I were to "reasonably" watch a maximum of four games every week for 26.5 weeks, that would be a "reasonably maximum" total of 106 games throughout the season.  Thirty-five games out of a 106-game maximum comes out to just barely above 33% for the season - an increase of 1% from how much I watched last year. This is truly shocking to me. I honestly can't believe it.
    • Here is the evolution of that percentage since 2018:
      • 2018: 11%
      • 2019: 26%
      • 2020: 29%
      • 2021: 17%
      • 2022: 31%
      • 2023: 27%
      • 2024: 32%
      • 2025: 33% - a (hilariously unexpected) new record!

Cost Per Game:

This year, I mooched off of my brother Austin's MLB TV subscription, which he got for free through, I think, his cell phone provider. This means, gloriously, that I paid nothing for access to baseball this year.

Here is how my cost-per-game ratio has developed over the years:
  • 2018: $2.85/game
  • 2019: $1.85/game
  • 2020: $1.97/game
  • 2021: $1.83/game
  • 2022: $1.14/game (split cost)
  • 2023: $2.94/game
  • 2024: $2.42/game
  • 2025: $0.00/game


Duration of Viewing:

Here is the breakdown of how long I watched each game, based on the definitions I established many years ago, from most often to least often:

  • Full (8-9 innings): 11 games (31%)
  • Most (5-7 innings): 9 games (26%)
  • Partial (3-4 innings): 9 games (26%)
  • Minimal (1-2 innings): 6 games (17%)

In a surprising revelation, I watched more "Full" games than any other duration this year. Typically, I think, "Most" has been my most common tendency.

Times Watched on the Team's Local Broadcast (Out of 35 Games Watched):

Here is this year's leaderboard for how many times I intentionally tuned into a team's local broadcast:

  1. Texas Rangers: 17
  2. Los Angeles Angels: 4
  3. Seattle Mariners: 3
  4. Chicago Cubs: 2
    Cleveland Guardians: 2
    Tampa Bay Rays: 2
  5. Baltimore Orioles: 1
    Los Angeles Dodgers: 1
    Miami Marlins: 1
    Toronto Blue Jays: 1
    Washington Nationals: 1

Times Watched (Total, Out of 70 Total Teams Watched):

Here is the breakdown of how many times I watched every team play, regardless of which broadcast I tuned into:

  1. Texas Rangers: 17
  2. Boston Red Sox: 4
    Cleveland Guardians: 4
    Los Angeles Angels: 4
    Miami Marlins: 4
  3. Chicago Cubs: 3
    Houston Astros: 3
    Seattle Mariners: 3
    Tampa Bay Rays: 3
    The Athletics: 3
    Toronto Blue Jays: 3
  4. Detroit Tigers: 2
    Kansas City Royals: 2
    New York Mets: 2
    San Francisco Giants: 2
    Washington Nationals: 2
  5. Atlanta Braves: 1
    Baltimore Orioles: 1
    Chicago White Sox: 1
    Cincinnati Reds: 1
    Los Angeles Dodgers: 1
    Milwaukee Brewers: 1
    Minnesota Twins: 1
    Philadelphia Phillies: 1
    Pittsburgh Pirates: 1

I watched 25 teams this year, which is honestly pretty good. There were five teams that I didn't get around to this season: the Diamondbacks and Rockies (because I couldn't), the Yankees and Padres (because I hate them), and the Cardinals (because I apparently just didn't care).

Also, it should be noted that the number of times I watched a team is not necessarily indicative of how much I like the team (other than the Rangers) but of how often it that team was playing at a time that was convenient for me to have watched them.

Overall Win/Loss Record:

  • This year, teams I tuned in to watch went 21-14, which sets a new record for winning percentage in a single season. I went on two five-game winning streaks, and the most consecutive losses I saw was a three-game skid in August. Not bad!
  • Running W/L percentage tracker:
    • 2018: .534
    • 2019: .625
    • 2020: .410
    • 2021: .492
    • 2022: .404
    • 2023: .490
    • 2024: .590
    • 2025: .666

Home/Road Split:

  • I tuned into 18 home broadcasts (51%) and 17 road broadcasts this year (49%).
  • When I watched a team's home broadcast, those teams went 11-7 (.611).
  • When I watched a team's road broadcast, those teams went 10-7 (.588).
  • Regardless of whose broadcast I watched, the home team went 18-17 (.514).
  • Regardless of whose broadcast I watched, the road team went 17-18 (.486).


Editor's note: My gosh, I can't believe I keep track of ALL OF THIS STUFF every year. Am I insane??

W/L Records for Teams Whose Broadcast I Watched:

  1. Washington Nationals: 1-0 (1.000)
  2. Tampa Bay Rays: 2-0 (1.000)
    Los Angeles Dodgers: 1-0 (1.000)
    Miami Marlins: 1-0 (1.000)
    Toronto Blue Jays: 1-0 (1.000)
  3. Seattle Mariners: 2-1 (.666)
  4. Texas Rangers: 10-7 (.588)
  5. Los Angeles Angels: 2-2 (.500)
    Cleveland Guardians: 1-1 (.500)
  6. Baltimore Orioles: 0-1 (.000)
    Chicago Cubs:
     0-2 (.000)

W/L Records for Every Team I Watched, Regardless of Broadcast:

  1. Kansas City Royals: 2-0 (1.000)
    San Francisco Giants: 2-0 (1.000)
    Los Angeles Dodgers: 1-0 (1.000)
    Minnesota Twins: 1-0 (1.000)
    Philadelphia Phillies: 1-0 (1.000)
    Pittsburgh Pirates: 1-0 (1.000)
  2. Seattle Mariners: 2-1 (.666)
    Tampa Bay Rays:
     2-1 (.666)
    The Athletics: 2-1 (.666)
  3. Texas Rangers: 10-7 (.588)
  4. Boston Red Sox: 2-2 (.500)
    Los Angeles Angels: 2-2 (.500)
    Detroit Tigers: 1-1 (.500)
    New York Mets: 1-1 (.500)
    Washington Nationals: 1-1 (.500)
  5. Houston Astros: 1-2 (.333)
    Toronto Blue Jays: 1-2 (.333)
  6. Cleveland Guardians: 1-3 (.250)
    Miami Marlins: 1-3 (.250)
  7. Atlanta Braves: 0-1 (.000)
    Baltimore Orioles: 0-1 (.000)
    Chicago White Sox: 0-1 (.000)
    Cincinnati Reds: 0-1 (.000)
    Milwaukee Brewers: 0-1 (.000)
    Chicago Cubs: 0-3 (.000)

Miscellaneous Stats or Other Interesting Things That Happened:

  • An MLB TV outage caused widespread issues for all users; it prevented me from watching the first inning and a half of the Rangers' Opening Day game. This was the straw that broke the camel's back, as far as me asking Austin if I could mooch off of his free subscription. I cancelled my subscription immediately (it wasn't scheduled to be charged for another day or two, at the time, so I cancelled and jumped over to Austin's account the following week).
  • Hurricane Milton destroyed Tropicana Field, forcing the Rays to have to play all of their home games in a minor league stadium this year, so that was different. The Athletics - who dropped "Oakland" from their team name this year as they prepare to move to Vegas in 2028 - also played their home games in a minor league stadium.
  • I watched a game on Father's Day.
  • I watched a Cubs game in which airplane flyovers caused several brief delays in the game and even soared over the stadium in the middle of "Star Wars" actor Hayden Christensen performing "Take Me Out to the Ballgame."
  • I saw wins and losses in extra-innings games, and I saw walk-off wins and losses.
  • I witnessed some of the most egregiously bad strike calls I can remember in my entire life.
  • I saw a batter turn in for a bunt and get hit right between the eyes. It was nasty.
  • I watched some late-season baseball with my newborn son, Corey.


Final Thoughts:

I am honestly quite shocked by a lot of these results. Granted, I think that bumping down my expectations for how much baseball I can reasonably watch probably really helps, but this ended up being a lot more positive than I expected it to be. I know that I didn't watch nearly as much baseball this season as I'm used to, but I've also just got a lot more stuff going on - and the fact that I didn't have to pay for MLB TV this year was probably a huge contributing factor in my dip in games watched. Had I paid for a subscription again, I would have put forth more effort, but hey - I think I've earned a little bit of free baseball. Huge shoutout to Austin for helping me out this season.

We'll be back at it again next season.

Until next time.

Monday, May 12, 2025

The Bitter Pill 5: #TankNote Backfires


It's a tough life, being a Utah Jazz fan. The past four or five years have been particularly miserable, from Rudy Gobert's contraction of coronavirus shutting down the NBA to the outright implosion of our roster (resulting in the trades of Gobert to Minnesota and Donovan Mitchell to Cleveland). The Jazz have dwelt in the absolute basement of the NBA standings for some time now, with Utah's CEO Danny Ainge thinking that the best path forward is to trade away our best players and amass a truly insane amount of second round draft picks. Needless to say, watching the Jazz get continually pummeled by 30 points and lost almost every night has not been fun. In fact, for all intents and purposes, I've stopped watching.

Stopped watching, I say, to the extent that my four-year-old firstborn son (named Stockton) has occasionally thought that the Utah Jazz were a hockey team.

Well, the Jazz finally did it this year. We finally came out on top... or bottom, as it were - winners of the ludicrous "tank-a-thon" race to the worst record in the league. Allegedly, this earned the Jazz the highest odds to get the number one pick in the upcoming 2025 draft. The odds, they said, were a 14% chance that the Jazz would get the best pick. But I had to wonder... isn't that just a nice way of saying that there was an 86% chance that we wouldn't get the number one pick? I mean, look at what happened to the Detroit Pistons last year: they were almost historically bad, then fell all the way to the fifth pick. The worst-case scenario for the Jazz before tonight's lottery would also have resulted in sliding all the way down to five, so, naturally, that's where I assumed that Utah would land. I tried to convince myself that I was just being a pessimist... but only time would tell.

I'll cut to the chase. We fell to five. Worst-case scenario. I KNEW IT.


(Also, side note - please, someone, explain this to me: how on earth does it make sense that the Jazz had a 47% chance of getting the fifth pick in the first place? Like, just flip a coin and we'll see if we're #5? That makes zero sense to me. Shouldn't those odds basically be inverted, almost? Of course we got the fifth pick! So dumb.)

Now, another one of the many things that are so stupid about this is that the three teams who ended up in the top three had no business being there.

  • Philadelphia is a perennial Eastern Conference playoff contender that had an unusually bad year. They had less than an 11% chance of getting the third pick. Who are we to doubt "The Process" that resulted in drafting Joel Embiid at number 3 in 2014, Jahlil Okafor (lol) with the third pick in 2015, and Ben Simmons (lol) with the number one pick in 2016? Haven't they been rewarded enough??
  • San Antonio, who just won the lottery two years ago and has already been the center of some NBA conspiracy theories (like getting the number one pick to select Tim Duncan after their hall of fame center David Robinson got hurt), had a 6% chance of getting the second pick this year. Perhaps, this was one final gift to the franchise, after their long-tenured coach Gregg Popovich announced his retirement a few days ago.
  • And Dallas, who made the play-in tournament and barely missed the actual playoffs this season, had a 1.8% chance of getting the number one pick.

What makes this even worse and much more suspicious is that Dallas just made one of the worst trades in the history of professional sports three months ago, when they dealt likely future hall of famer Luka Doncic to the Los Angeles Lakers for the absurdly injury-prone center Anthony Davis (who promptly injured himself several times after becoming a Maverick). Unsurprisingly, social media and basketball fans at large mocked Dallas for the transaction, and Mavericks fans serenaded their home team with chants of "Fire Nico" (Harrison, the Dallas general manager) chants just four seconds into the first game of their post-Doncic era.

Could this be the most recent instance of the NBA rewarding a team and fan base that notoriously lost a megastar? LeBron James left the Cleveland Cavaliers with his infamous "Decision" press conference in 2010, then Cleveland got the number one pick three out of the next four years. (Honestly, I forgot how egregious that was. Insane!)


Another eyebrow-raising draft lottery was in 2019, when the New Orleans Pelicans got the top pick after the aforementioned Anthony Davis publicly demanded a trade (and was ultimately traded to Los Angeles, where he played until being traded for Doncic). The Pelicans would go on to select the draft's prospect, Zion Williamson, that summer.

Of course, the most popular theory that points to the draft lottery being rigged is the 1985 NBA draft, which brought Georgetown center Patrick Ewing to the New York Knicks, one of the biggest media markets in the league. Similarly, one could argue that Dallas sending Luka to Los Angeles (another of the league's hottest destinations) then being rewarded with the top pick in the subsequent draft could have been a conspiracy.

But another layer to this whole fiasco that hurts for Jazz fans is that Utah facilitated the trade that allowed the Luka-AD trade to happen in the first place! And, on top of that, Danny Ainge claims that he wasn't even aware that he was helping the Lakers! DANNY! WHAT WERE YOU DOING??

If nothing else, tonight's draft lottery disaster should prove that tanking doesn't work. Here was an interesting stat tweeted out by ESPN's Field Yates:


I have never been a proponent of teams losing on purpose, nor do I think that teams should be rewarded for (intentionally) playing badly... but that's just how the NBA is set up. Tanking is incentivized, unlike any other professional sport, and I absolutely hate it. But, if those are the ground rules, if that's the way this world works, and if the Jazz really went to all that effort to claim the worst record, why couldn't it have just worked ONE TIME??

Unfortunately (and extremely predictably), the Jazz were as unlucky as possible tonight, and it will almost certainly result in another "rebuilding" (AKA "tanking") season in 2025. We're really going to try to do this all over again next year. I feel so bad for the Jazz players. It can't be fun to be a part of this process, and it seems as though there is no end in sight. Ugh.

I, for one, have no interest in that at all.

Go Utah Hockey Club Mammoth!


*****


If you've got nothing else going on right now and feel like reading about some of my other most painful sports memories, consider checking out these old posts:

All right, somebody take away my technology. I've had enough for the day. I apologize profusely to my family for being a giant, breathing waste of space since 5:00 PM this evening. I promise, I'll make up for it tomorrow.

But the pain will last a lifetime. The pain will never fade. At least I saw it coming.

Tuesday, October 1, 2024

MLB TV Viewing Stats - 2024


Another baseball season has come and gone, which means that it's time for me to crunch some numbers and, for no other reason than to satisfy my own curiosity, see how many games I watched this year. This is the (*counts on fingers*) SEVENTH YEAR?!? that I've done this, which is crazy, but it actually is a pretty helpful way of helping me determine whether I'm getting any value out of my subscription.

I won't go into great detail to explain a lot of how and why I do the things that I do, but if you're really curious, you can go back and check out some of my older MLB TV blogs.

Anyway, let's get down to business.


Stats Tracked on the Spreadsheet:

Basically nothing changed on my spreadsheet this year, although I did add one extra column to (hopefully) help me more easily keep track of whether I watched the home team or the road team's broadcast. Here's a quick refresher on what I kept track of for each game that I watch:
  • Road team
  • Home team
  • Home or Road Broadcast
  • Winning team
  • W/L result of the team whose broadcast I watched
  • Duration of viewing
    • 1-2 innings: "Minimal"
    • 3-4 innings: "Partial"
    • 5-7 innings: "Most"
    • 8-9 innings: "Full"
  • Any interesting notes about the game

Persisting Factors that Affected Viewing Habits:

  • All Arizona Diamondback and Colorado Rockies games are blacked out in Utah. It still makes no sense.
  • Any nationally televised games (FOX, ESPN, TBS, etc.) are not viewable on MLB TV.
  • I work from home and have two young children whose first priority of entertainment during the day is not watching sports.
  • I've been married for five years now, which means that my first priority of entertainment at night can't be watching sports, either.

Untracked Games:

As was the case last year, I can't remember any games that I watched that were not broadcast on MLB TV. For the second year in a row, I didn't go on a baseball trip, so I didn't watch any MLB games in person. Maybe next year.

Total Number of Games Watched and Cost Per Game:

  • I'll use the same basic explanation that I gave last year: if all 30 Major League teams play 162 games a season, and if each single game counts as two "games played" (one game for the home team and one game for the road team), that equals a total of 4,860 games played.
    • Accounting for ReGiOnAl BlAcKoUtS of the Arizona Diamondbacks and Colorado Rockies, as well as nationally televised games, I have been lowering the maximum amount of games I would have had access to down to 4,356 games per season.
  • I watched a total of 61 baseball games this season, or a total of 122 "games played."
    • This is 10 more games than I watched in 2023.
  • Based on the approximate number of 4,356 "games played" that I had access to, I watched about 2.8% of those games, a 0.5% increase from last year.
  • This year's MLB season ran from March 28 - September 30, a duration of 187 days. For the past two years, I have been using the guideline that I could "reasonably" watch one baseball game per day. I mean, I probably could. Do I watch one game per day? Of course not. But I probably could. For most of this season, it would probably reasonable for me to watch one game per week. But we'll just keep going with it, I guess.
    • I watched a total of 61 games throughout the 187-day season, which is 32% of the maximum number of games that I reasonably could have watched - a 5% increase from how much I watched last year.
    • Here is the evolution of that percentage since 2018:
      • 2018: 11%
      • 2019: 26%
      • 2020: 29%
      • 2021: 17%
      • 2022: 31%
      • 2023: 27%
      • 2024: 32% - A new record!
  • This year, I ended up paying the full cost of the subscription (my brother Austin is a big Dodgers fan but currently lives in South Carolina, which would have him staying up until like 2 in the morning any time he wanted to watch a game on the west coast, so I don't really blame him for not wanting in this year). As usual, I divided the cost of my subscription by the number of games that I watched, which came out to about $2.42 per game.

Let me take a break here and say something. I am extremely proud of myself for running this cost down this year. I realized in about mid-August that I was not watching much baseball - and that my cost per game was, at that point, more than $6 per game watched, which would absolutely not make this subscription worth it in the future. On August 25, I watched my 24th game of the season, meaning that I went on a freaking tear and watched at least a minimal part of 38 games in 36 days. In that span, I lowered my cost per game by almost $4 per game, which is absolutely crazy. Heeeeeeeeck yeah. Anyway, very proud of myself. Now, where were we?

  • Here is how my cost-per-game ratio has developed over the years:
    • 2018: $2.85/game
    • 2019: $1.85/game
    • 2020: $1.97/game
    • 2021: $1.83/game
    • 2022: $1.14/game (split cost)
    • 2023: $2.94/game
    • 2024: $2.42/game


Duration of Viewing:

The following is a breakdown of how long I watched each game, based on the definitions I established many years ago, in order of duration:

  • Most (5-7 innings): 21 games (34%)
  • Partial (3-4 innings): 18 games (30%)
  • Full (8-9 innings): 13 games (21%)
  • Minimal (1-2 innings): 9 games (15%)

Times Watched on the Team's Local Broadcast (Out of 61 Games Watched):

Here is this year's leaderboard for how many times I intentionally tuned into a team's local broadcast:

  1. Texas Rangers: 23
  2. Cleveland Guardians: 6
  3. Seattle Mariners: 5
  4. Atlanta Braves: 3
    Baltimore Orioles: 3
    Los Angeles Dodgers: 3
    Washington Nationals: 3
  5. Cincinnati Reds: 2
    Miami Marlins: 2
    Philadelphia Phillies: 2
    San Diego Padres: 2
    San Francisco Giants: 2
    Tampa Bay Rays: 2
  6. Kansas City Royals: 1
    Los Angeles Angels: 1
    Toronto Blue Jays: 1

Times Watched (Total, Out of 102 Total Teams Watched):

Here is a breakdown of how many times I watched all of the other teams play, regardless of which broadcast I tuned into:

  1. Texas Rangers: 23
  2. Seattle Mariners: 10
  3. Cleveland Guardians: 7
    Tampa Bay Rays: 7
  4. Chicago White Sox: 5
    Oakland A's: 5
    San Diego Padres: 5
  5. Atlanta Braves: 4
    Baltimore Orioles: 4
    Los Angeles Angels: 4
    Philadelphia Phillies: 4
    St. Louis Cardinals: 4
    Toronto Blue Jays: 4
    Washington Nationals: 4
  6. Chicago Cubs: 3
    Detroit Tigers: 3
    Houston Astros: 3
    Kansas City Royals: 3
    Los Angeles Dodgers: 3
    Miami Marlins: 3
    Minnesota Twins: 3
  7. Boston Red Sox: 2
    Cincinnati Reds: 2
    New York Mets: 2
    Pittsburgh Pirates: 2
    San Francisco Giants: 2
  8. Milwaukee Brewers: 1

There were three teams that I didn't watch a single time this year: the Diamondbacks and Rockies (because I couldn't), and the Yankees (because I hate them).


Overall Win/Loss Record:

  • This year, teams I tuned in to watch went 36-25, which is all right with me. The teams I watched had some hot streaks and some cold streaks, but I feel like I got to see some pretty good games, overall. This was my second-highest winning percentage since I started tracking this stuff, and my best season since 2019.
  • Running W/L percentage tracker:
    • 2018: .534
    • 2019: .625
    • 2020: .410
    • 2021: .492
    • 2022: .404
    • 2023: .490
    • 2024: .590

Home/Road Split:

  • I tuned into 25 home broadcasts (41%) and 36 road broadcasts this year (59%).
  • When I watched a team's home broadcast, those teams went 20-5 (.800), which is totally insane.
  • When I watched a team's road broadcast, those teams went 16-20 (.444).
  • Regardless of whose broadcast I watched, the home team went 40-21 (.656).
  • Regardless of whose broadcast I watched, the road team went 21-40 (.344).

Editor's note: For the record, that was probably the fastest that I have ever done that math.


W/L Records for Teams Whose Broadcast I Watched:

  1. Los Angeles Dodgers: 3-0 (1.000)
    Philadelphia Phillies: 2-0 (1.000)
    San Diego Padres: 2-0 (1.000)
    San Francisco Giants: 2-0 (1.000)
    Los Angeles Angels: 1-0 (1.000)
    Toronto Blue Jays: 1-0 (1.000)
  2. Cleveland Guardians: 5-1 (.833)
  3. Atlanta Braves: 2-1 (.666)Seattle Mariners: 3-2 (.600)
  4. Texas Rangers: 12-11 (.522)
  5. Cincinnati Reds: 1-1 (.500)
    Miami Marlins:
     1-1 (.500)
  6. Baltimore Orioles: 1-2 (.333)
  7. Kansas City Royals: 0-1 (.000)
    Tampa Bay Rays:
     0-2 (.000)
    Washington Nationals:
     0-3 (.000)

W/L Records for Every Team I Watched, Regardless of Broadcast:

  1. Los Angeles Dodgers: 3-0 (1.000)
    Minnesota Twins: 3-0 (1.000)
    Boston Red Sox: 2-0 (1.000)
    San Francisco Giants: 2-0 (1.000)
    Milwaukee Brewers: 
    1-0 (1.000)
  2. Philadelphia Phillies: 3-1 (.750)
    St. Louis Cardinals: 3-1 (.750)
  3. Cleveland Guardians: 5-2 (.714)
  4. Detroit Tigers: 2-1 (.666)
    Houston Astros: 2-1 (.666)
  5. Texas Rangers: 12-11 (.522)
  6. Atlanta Braves: 2-2 (.500)
    Cincinnati Reds: 1-1 (.500)
    New York Mets: 1-1 (.500)
    Pittsburgh Pirates: 1-1 (.500)
  7. Los Angeles Angels: 2-2 (.500)
    Toronto Blue Jays: 2-2 (.500)
  8. San Diego Padres: 2-3 (.400)
  9. Chicago Cubs: 1-2 (.333)
    Miami Marlins: 1-2 (.333)
  10. Seattle Mariners: 3-7 (.300)
  11. Baltimore Orioles: 1-3 (.250)
  12. Oakland A's: 1-4 (.200)
  13. Kansas City Royals: 0-3 (.000)
    Washington Nationals:
     0-4 (.000)
    Chicago White Sox:
     0-5 (.000)
    Tampa Bay Rays:
     0-7 (.000)

Man, what a horrible year for the Rays. Yikes.

Miscellaneous Stats or Other Interesting Things That Happened:

  • The first game I watched this season was former Rangers color commentator CJ Nitkowski's first game as a Braves broadcaster. I knew I recognized that voice!
  • I saw big innings, like the Rangers scoring 10 runs in the second inning in a game early in the season. I saw bad defense, like the Astros' back-up third baseman having four errors in a span of three or four innings.
  • I saw controversial calls! I saw walk-off wins and losses! I saw blown leads to terrible teams, including the Chicago White Sox - the worst team in MLB history! I saw big comeback victories! I turned games off that I should have kept watching! And I almost certainly kept watching games that I should have turned off!
  • I saw the Braves get shut out for the first time in over a year.
  • In a rather strange series of events, I turned a game on in the third inning and the first two pitches I saw were hit for home runs by the opposing team. Lovely!
  • I teams' season opener. I watched a game on Father's Day. I watched a Dodgers game last week that my parents and brothers were attending.
  • I watched a Guardians game in which Emmanuel Clase tied the franchise record for saves.
  • And speaking of history, most impressively, I was watching the game when Shohei Ohtani passed the 50 home run/50 stolen bases club, in which he posted an absolutely ABSURD stat line of 6/6, 3 HR, 4 R, 10 RBI, 2 SB. This performance pretty much single-handedly saved my fantasy baseball season and led me all the way to the championship, so... Shohei? Thank you. From the bottom of my heart.


Final Thoughts:

Last season, I ended my blog by saying, "Next year, I better either split the cost or just watch like a dozen more games to make me feel better about myself." Well, I watched 10 more games this year than I did last year, and I feel pretty good about myself. I feel good about myself because I really, really slacked this year. I don't know exactly what the cause was - probably that the WORLD SERIES CHAMPION TEXAS RANGERS just weren't very good this year - but I realized in mid-August that I had a long way to go in order to make this subscription worth it. And you know what? I think I did a pretty good job, there in the final month and a half of the season.

That's about it. I'll be watching the playoffs a little bit, most likely, but not with anywhere near the anxiety or engagement as I did last year. As long as the Astros don't win, everything will be ok.

Until next time!

Sunday, October 15, 2023

MLB TV Viewing Stats - 2023

 



This is my sixth year of posting my MLB TV stats, so I'm going to shorten a lot of my long-winded explanations of what I do, how I do it, and what all this stuff means. Every time I watch a baseball game through my MLB TV subscription, I use a Google Docs spreadsheet to keep track of some stats about every game. This post will break all of that useless information down.


Welcome, friends, and thank you for joining me.




Stats Tracked on the Spreadsheet:

Nothing changed on my spreadsheet this year. Again, here's what I kept track of for each game that I watched:

  • Road team
  • Home team
  • Broadcast (which team's TV feed I tuned into)
  • Winning team
  • W/L result of the team whose broadcast I watched
  • Duration of viewing
    • 1-2 innings: "Minimal"
    • 3-4 innings: "Partial"
    • 5-7 innings: "Most"
    • 8-9 innings: "Full"
  • Any interesting notes about the game


Persisting Factors that Affected Viewing Habits:

  • All Arizona Diamondback and Colorado Rockies games are blacked out in Utah. It makes no sense.
  • Any nationally televised games (FOX, ESPN, TBS, etc.) are not viewable on MLB TV.
  • I work from home and have two young children whose first priority of entertainment is not watching sports.


Untracked Games:

  • I cannot recall any games that I watched that were not broadcast on MLB TV. Also somewhat of note, for the first time in several years, I did not attend an MLB game in person.


Total Number of Games Watched and Cost Per Game:

  • This year, I'm going to spare you all the math I put into these calculations, but it suffices me to say that if all 30 Major League teams play 162 games a season, and if each single game counts as two "games played" (one game for the home team and one game for the road team), that equals a total of 4,860 games played.
    • Accounting for the idiotic regional blackouts of the Arizona Diamondbacks and Colorado Rockies, as well as nationally televised games, I have been lowering the maximum amount of games I would have had access to down to 4,356 games per season.
  • I watched a total of 51 baseball games this season, or a total of 102 "games played."
    • This is six fewer games than I watched in 2022.
    • Based on the approximate number of 4,356 "games played" that I had access to, I watched about 2.3% of those games, a 0.3% decrease from last year.
  • This year's MLB season ran from March 30 - October 1, a duration of 186 days.
    • Last year, I lowered the maximum number of games that I could reasonably have watched per day to one, which I think is totally reasonable. Of course, there were probably days when I might have watched part of multiple games, but that would definitely have been the exception, not the rule.
  • I watched a total of 51 games throughout the 186-day season, which is 27% of the maximum number of games that I reasonably could have watched - a minor dip from how much I watched last year.
    • Here is the evolution of that percentage since 2018:
      • 2018: 11%
      • 2019: 26%
      • 2020: 29%
      • 2021: 17%
      • 2022: 31%
      • 2023: 27%
  • Unlike last year, I unfortunately did not split the cost of MLB TV with my brother. (Long story short, we found out that he got it for free through T-Mobile the day after I my subscription automatically renewed. Bummer.) By dividing the cost of my subscription by the number of games that I watched, the math comes out to $2.94 per game - in the neighborhood of triple what I was paying per game last year and easily my worst ratio since I started keeping track of these ridiculous statistics.
    • Here is how my cost-per-game ratio has developed over the years:
      • 2018: $2.85/game
      • 2019: $1.85/game
      • 2020: $1.97/game
      • 2021: $1.83/game
      • 2022: $1.14/game
      • 2023: $2.94/game



Duration of Viewing:

The following is a breakdown of how long I typically watched each game, based on the definitions previously discussed, in order of duration:

  • Most: 21 games (41%)
  • Partial: 14 games (27%)
  • Full: 11 games (22%)
  • Minimal: 5 games (10%)


Times Watched on the Team's Local Broadcast (Out of 51 Games Watched):

Here is the leaderboard for how many times I intentionally tuned into a team's local broadcast:

  1. Texas Rangers: 21
  2. Tampa Bay Rays: 10
  3. Cincinnati Reds: 3
    Seattle Mariners: 3
  4. Miami Marlins: 2
    Washington Nationals: 2
  5. Chicago Cubs: 1
    Detroit Tigers: 1
    Houston Astros: 1
    Los Angeles Angels: 1
    New York Mets: 1
    New York Yankees: 1
    Philadelphia Phillies: 1
    San Diego Padres: 1
    San Francisco Giants: 1
    Toronto Blue Jays: 1

Times Watched (Total, Out of 102 Total Teams Watched):

Once again, I watched 26 out of the 30 teams play this year. The four teams I didn't watch were the Arizona Diamondbacks and Colorado Rockies (as always), the Minnesota Twins and the Los Angeles Dodgers (who I apparently have a habit of never watching). Here is a breakdown of how many times I watched all of the other teams play, regardless of which broadcast I tuned into:

  1. Texas Rangers: 21
  2. Tampa Bay Rays: 10
  3. Seattle Mariners: 6
  4. Chicago White Sox: 5
    Toronto Blue Jays: 5
    Washington Nationals: 5
  5. Boston Red Sox: 4
    Miami Marlins: 4
  6. Cincinnati Reds: 3
    Cleveland Guardians: 3
    Detroit Tigers: 3
    Los Angeles Angels: 3
    New York Mets: 3
    Oakland A's: 3
    Philadelphia Phillies: 3
  7. Baltimore Orioles: 2
    Chicago Cubs: 2
    Houston Astros: 2
    Milwaukee Brewers: 2
    San Francisco Giants: 2
  8. Kansas City Royals: 1
    New York Yankees: 1
    Pittsburgh Pirates: 1
    San Diego Padres: 1
    St. Louis Cardinals: 1


Overall Win/Loss Record:

  • This year, teams I tuned in to watch went 25-26, which felt a lot worse than it actually was. The surprising thing is that my top two teams this year were the Texas Rangers and the Tampa Bay Rays, who were two of the best teams in the league all year long, so I would have anticipated watching a few more wins. Sadly, that wasn't the case, and I watched some pretty good teams lose a lot of winnable games. Thankfully, it wasn't quite as miserable as last year.
  • Running W/L percentage tracker:
    • 2018: .534
    • 2019: .625
    • 2020: .410
    • 2021: .492
    • 2022: .404
    • 2023: .490


Home/Road Split:

Editor's note: I said last year that this was, inexplicably, the most difficult category for me to calculate, but I got it right this year on my first try. I am proud. The home/road W-L numbers are tricky, though. I made some changes to my spreadsheet so that it's hopefully a little easier next year.

  • Of the 51 games I tuned into during 2023, the team I wanted to watch played 24 home games (47%) and 27 road games (53%).
  • When I watched a team's home broadcast, that team went 14-10 (.583).
  • When I watched a team's road broadcast, that team went 11-16 (.407).
  • Regardless of whose broadcast I watched, the home team went 30-21 (.588).
  • Regardless of whose broadcast I watched, the road team went 21-30 (.411).



W/L Records for Teams Whose Broadcast I Watched:

  1. Detroit Tigers: 1-0 (1.000)
    Los Angeles Angels: 1-0 (1.000)
    Philadelphia Phillies: 1-0 (1.000)
    San Diego Padres: 1-0 (1.000)
  2. Tampa Bay Rays: 6-4 (.600)
  3. Texas Rangers: 12-9 (.571)
  4. Washington Nationals: 1-1 (.500)
  5. Cincinnati Reds: 1-2 (.333)
    Seattle Mariners: 1-2 (.333)
  6. Chicago Cubs: 0-1 (.000)
    Houston Astros: 0-1 (.000)
    New York Mets: 0-1 (.000)
    New York Yankees: 0-1 (.000)
    San Francisco Giants: 0-1 (.000)
    Toronto Blue Jays: 0-1 (.000)
    Miami Marlins: 0-2 (.000)

W/L Records for Every Team I Watched, Regardless of Broadcast:

  1. Milwaukee Brewers: 2-0 (1.000)
    Pittsburgh Pirates: 1-0 (1.000)
    San Diego Padres: 1-0 (1.000)
  2. Atlanta Braves: 3-1 (.750)
  3. Detroit Tigers: 2-1 (.666)
    Los Angeles Angels: 2-1 (.666)
    New York Mets: 2-1 (.666)
    Philadelphia Phillies: 2-1 (.666)
  4. Tampa Bay Rays: 6-4 (.600)
    Chicago White Sox: 3-2 (.600)
  5. Texas Rangers: 12-9 (.571)
  6. Houston Astros: 2-2 (.500)
    Miami Marlins: 2-2 (.500)
    Baltimore Orioles: 1-1 (.500)
    Chicago Cubs: 1-1 (.500)
    San Francisco Giants: 1-1 (.500)
  7. Toronto Blue Jays: 2-3 (.400)
  8. Seattle Mariners: 2-4 (.333)
    Cleveland Guardians: 1-2 (.333)
    Cincinnati Reds: 1-2 (.333)
    Oakland A's: 1-2 (.333)
  9. Washington Nationals: 1-4 (.200)
  10. Kansas City Royals: 0-1 (.000)
    New York Yankees: 0-1 (.000)
    St. Louis Cardinals: 0-1 (.000)
    Boston Red Sox: 0-4 (.000)


Miscellaneous Stats or Other Interesting Things That Happened:

  • I saw big comebacks, I saw big chokes. I turned games off early and missed big comebacks and big chokes. I watched extra innings wins and suffered through extra innings losses. It's the circle of life.
  • I saw a Brewers player hit a grand slam for his first major league home run.
  • I saw a Rangers player get hit in the face by a pitch.
  • I watched the Rangers beat the Orioles at the hospital with my newborn son.
  • I watched the Rays tie Modern Era record for winning streak to start the season (13 games) and then watched them lose the next game, failing to break that record.
  • I also saw the Rangers and Mariners snap eight-game win streaks, because I'm just such a good luck charm
  • I watched a game on Jackie Robinson Day, the Fourth of July and Labor Day.
  • I saw some weird stuff, like when Vlad Guerrero Jr. threw his entire mitt to first base for an out after a grounder got stuck in his webbing, and when the Reds hit a "little league home run."
  • And - something I never thought I'd see - I watched Max Scherzer's debut for the Texas Rangers.



Final Thoughts:

Two things stick out: I didn't split the cost of the subscription this year, which essentially doubled my cost-per-game from the get-go, and I just didn't watch as much baseball this year as I wanted to or probably could have. Parenthood, man. Parenthood. There are just more important things that I need to be doing with my life, other than just watching baseball at all times. That, and I sometimes just get outvoted or overruled about what goes on the big TV. That's life, and that's ok.

But next year, I better either split the cost or just watch like a dozen more games to make me feel better about myself.

And... we'll see ya then, probably.


Go Rangers!

Thursday, June 22, 2023

Bing AI predicts the 2023 NBA Draft



Earlier today, we asked Bing AI to predict the first round of the 2023 NBA Draft. Here's how they did, compared to the actual results:

Pick/TeamAI PredictionActual PickAI Result
1 SASVictor WembanyamaVictor WembanyamaCorrect
2 CHABrandon MillerBrandon MillerCorrect
3 PORScoot HendersonScoot HendersonCorrect
4 HOUAmen ThompsonAmen ThompsonCorrect
5 DETJarace WalkerAusar Thompson3 picks early
6 ORLAnthony BlackAnthony BlackCorrect
7 INDTaylor HendricksBilal Coulibaly2 picks early
8 WASAusar ThompsonJarace Walker3 picks late
9 UTABilal CoulibalyTaylor Hendricks2 picks late
10 DALJaden BradleyCason WallaceNot drafted
11 ORLJalen DurenJett HowardDrafted in 2022
12 OKCKeyonte GeorgeDereck Lively II4 picks early
13 TORChris LivingstonGradey DickSecond round
14 NOPMark MitchellJordan HawkinsNot drafted
15 ATLJett HowardKobe Bufkin4 picks late
16 UTAOusmane DiengKeyonte GeorgeDrafted in 2022
17 LALCaleb HoustanJalen Hood-SchifinoDrafted in 2022
18 MIAPatrick Baldwin Jr.Jaime Jaquez Jr.Drafted in 2022
19 GSWKennedy ChandlerBrandin PodziemskiDrafted in 2022
20 HOUYannick NzosaCam WhitmoreDrafted in 2022
21 BKNNikola JovicNoah ClowneyDrafted in 2022
22 BKNMoussa DiabateDariq WhiteheadDrafted in 2022
23 PORMichael Foster Jr.Kris MurrayUndrafted in 2022
24 SACDyson DanielsOlivier-Maxence ProsperDrafted in 2022
25 MEMJean MonteroMarcus SasserUndrafted in 2022
26 INDAdem BonaBen SheppardNot drafted
27 CHARoko PrkacinNick Smith Jr.Not drafted
28 UTAJD DavisonBrice SensabaughDrafted in 2022
29 INDTyTy WashingtonJulian StrawtherDrafted in 2022
30 LACPeyton WatsonKobe BrownDrafted in 2022

After a blazing hot start (and picking one player who would be selected at the end of the second round), the AI swerved completely off the rails, guessing 12 players that were drafted last year, two players who entered the NBA after going undrafted in 2022, and four other players who were, for one reason or another, not drafted in tonight's first round.

Eh, you can't win 'em all, right AI?

To see what we'll ask AI to do next, keep it here at The Underground.

(Also, the image used at the top of this post is the result of us asking the AI to draw a picture of a computer watching basketball.)